Rami Ungar The Writer

You know how, when people go down to Florida during spring or summer break, they have all these wild stories to tell? Odd mishaps, hilarious misadventures, fascinating tales of self-discovery? Yeah, I never had any of those. When I was growing up, the few times I visited Florida was with family. And when I got old enough to go on spring or summer trips, I worked and stayed home because I couldn’t afford the trips. And when I could afford them, I had other things that required my attention.

So, when I learned I was going to be attending a conference related to my day job in Florida with several of my coworkers, I hoped I’d get something I could call my wild Florida story.

Hoo-boy, did I get what I wished for! Because, as I’m sure many of you know, we had a hurricane last week. Hurricane Debby. And she caused the conference to be canceled…while some of us were already in the air.

Yeah, I’m not kidding. Me and about four other coworkers, including my boss, were up at the crack of dawn to get on the plane and head to Florida. And when we got off the plane, about half an hour later than expected due to the rainy weather, and then my coworker Charlotte tells us all, “Hey, I just got an email from Headquarters. The conference is canceled!”

Well, you can imagine how upset and confused we were about that. Here we are, already in Florida, and the reason we paid company money to get here is now up in smoke! In the end, we confirmed our hotel rooms hadn’t been canceled and made our way to the hotel. After that, it was decided that we would all just spend the week working from Florida and try to get home when we could. Worst case scenario, we’d go home on the days we were originally scheduled to.

So yeah, that was pretty wild. But it gets wilder. You see, the hotel we were staying at is attached to a mall (begin Googling now to figure out which one we stayed at). And in that mall, there’s a tattoo parlor. And I went into that tattoo parlor. And when I came out, I had….a tattoo!

Yeah, bet you didn’t see that coming. Still, going to Florida and returning with a tattoo from a local shop does feel like something that would happen on a wild Florida trip. And I’m quite satisfied with the result. The two symbols are from two anime I’m quite fond of, with two bands around my wrist like a bracelet.

And don’t worry, my workplace is generally tolerant of tattoos, depending on the placement and what they’re depicting.

After all that, my week was generally calm. During the days, we would work from our hotel rooms, and I think we all got a ton done from our hotel rooms (I know I did). In the evenings, we mostly stuck around the hotel, since only one of us had a rental car and rideshares are expensive. However, we did go out on Wednesday to a buffet restaurant that served Mexican and Chinese food for some reason. That was fun.

We also spent some time in the mall, which once you ignore the pounding noise and ton of people, could be fun. My favorite part of the mall was the revolving sushi bar, where you were able to grab sushi from a conveyer belt. If you haven’t tried that, it is a blast! See if any are in your area! In addition, there was a bar that served frozen cocktails. Let’s just say I had more than one of those during the week (though always on my own time).

Of course, it wasn’t all finishing work assignments and spiked slushies. For one thing, I found six ants over the course of the week in areas they shouldn’t be (AKA indoors with me!). Those ants are no longer among the living, believe me. And on Thursday, I helped one of my coworkers, who was nervous about flying the next day, with some hypnosis. And she even let me film it and post it to YouTube, which you can watch below! (I recommend putting in your earbuds and turning the volume up for this video.)

After that, it was pretty quiet. I had my last night in Florida, and then I flew home.

So yeah, I got my wild Florida story. Maybe, at 31, I got it a bit later than other people do, but damn, was it fun and unpredictable and I got some souvenirs out of it (including the utterly creepy tee from the mall’s Hot Topic that I’m wearing below). Whether or I not get a story out of any of it, I don’t know (though the idea of a Florida trip gone wrong is fertile ground for a horror story).

But now, I’m home, and I’m enjoying being here for a good, long while.

And maybe it’s just me, but I think things are going to work out for me over the coming weeks. Here’s hoping that actually happens.

And in the meantime, until next time, good night and pleasant nightmares, my Followers of Fear.