You know, I’ve never had any problems writing from the perspectives of either boys or girls. It’s never been an issue for me, and yet I hear from writers all the time about how they’re males and they just can’t get into the minds of their female characters, or for some women, they just can’t figure out what motivates their main character’s boyfriend. I kind of feel like an outsider in these conversations.
Granted, I think most writers feel more comfortable writing characters that are more like us, and that includes gender. It’s easier to relate to someone with the same likes, dislikes, and struggles, and it can be difficult at first to get into the head of someone with a completely different sort of life. But I think with time and experience, it gets a little easier.
Take me for example: I’ve had both time and experience learning how women think. I grew up in a house with several women in it, and that’s not including pets! I kind of got used to women early on, and some of these women, including my mom, were big and positive influences on my writing (this is also where my beliefs on women’s rights were formed, but that’s no surprise, right?). And to add to that, I grew up watching a lot of shows that featured women characters as leads playing out the traditional male role of fighting evil, such as Sailor Moon and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. With all that input, I got an inkling on how to write from a female perspective.
And you know what? It showed! Some of my early short stories featured women in lead roles, and they got praised for how realistic these girls I wrote seemed. It was a big boost to my confidence, and it’s why a lot of my works–such as my short story Doll’s Game or my science-fiction novel Reborn City–feature female protagonists.
So yeah, I’ve had the time and experience, enough that I can write some decent female characters. And I’m sure that with time and experience, I’ll be able to write all sorts of characters and make them all feel real. Just a matter of time, right?
What about you? Do you have trouble or ease writing for the opposite sex?
Rami Ungar The Writer 
I write both, but maybe I do one or the other badly? They feel the same to me. Sometimes I change the sex later, and it doesn’t seem to make a difference. Except if I have to change ‘plumbing issues.’ But then I don’t write sex scenes, or follow any of my characters to the bathroom…so does it matter?
I don’t think ppl are as different as ppl like to pretend. Are they? They get put in different places by society, but the internal stuff is all the same.
I feel the same way for the most part: mentally, we all have the same thoughts, ideas, insecurities, fears. However occasionally there are some differences that make you think “oh, this is something a guy would think” or “only a girl would think that.”
I think it’s different for every writer, how they feel about writing from the point of view of someone for a different sex. it depends on their experience and on how well they can grasp the human mind, and some do it terribly, and others do it well. (jk rowling comes to mind for the latter).
Originally, I wrote female lead characters, and there was this one npc, that I had who was male, named Baldrick. He was a rough and tumble gent, but actually worked for my female lead. I had no trouble playing a male, but never used him for relationship stories.
Now days, I play, male and female leads, and while I have written sex scenes, my fellow writers know that I don’t mix the stories and real life.
Good to know. I still blush at the thought of sex scenes, though.
I used to, but to me I think of it as just another angle of a story. I have been doing a human role play with my fellow writers, called Death Club. And while there are some sex scenes in it, I feel its tastefully done. (On the whole) 😛
that’s good to know.