proper decisions | Rami Ungar The Writer

Posts Tagged ‘proper decisions’

And I Heard Something Dumber Than What Huckabee Said

Posted: December 17, 2012 in Politics and Leadership, Reflections
Tags: government, gun control, politics and leadership, proper decisions

During the election, I got incensed when politicians and media personalities said idiotic crap about women’s bodies. Now, I have plenty of material on politicians and gun control! For example, Mike Huckabee said that “systematically removing God” from public schools was the reason behind the massacre, and that he “wasn’t surprised” that the shooting happened. He tried to clarify his views later by saying that he meant “God’s name is only invoked after the tragedy”. That’s sometimes true, but we all understood what you meant the first time you said it.

However, I just heard something worse: Representative Dennis Richardson of Oregon said that teachers should be allowed to carry guns on campus and in the classroom, and if he’d been a teacher, he’d have shot Adam Lanza. Yes, he is a Republican, and no, I have no idea if he’s had psychological testing.

Still, I have to ask: WHAT ARE YOU SMOKING?! DID YOU GO UPSTATE FOR SOME WEED THIS WEEKEND?

If you didn’t get that last question, you haven’t been paying attention to the drugs debate enough and you need to brush up on your US geography.

But seriously, what the heck are you suggesting? That teachers have guns? That’s a stupid idea. A tattoo or a piercing is okay, it may be a little garish or obscene to some people, but tattoos or piercings don’t have negative effects on children, they don’t harm children. Guns though, can harm children. And even if you lock the guns up, there’s always the one kid, even in kindergarten, who can get into places they shouldn’t. And every time a gun gets in a school, it always causes chaos, as this past weekend demonstrated well enough. How does putting guns in school for the teachers supposed to protect anyone?

I really don’t understand how giving people more access to weapons of death and destruction is supposed to protect others and stop the killing that comes from these same weapons. It’s counterintuitive, if you ask me, and I also think Representative Richardson is not going to be reelected because of this comment. If anything, we need less guns, especially the powerful assault rifles. Like Senator Feinstein from California said, those guns aren’t for hunting deer, they’re for hunting people!

Looks Like Someone Got The Message

Posted: December 16, 2012 in Living and Life, Politics and Leadership, Progress Report, Reflections, Social Activism
Tags: activism, government, gun control, politics and leadership, proper decisions

This morning I wrote a post calling for everyone reading this blog to contact every politician they can think of and ask them to work for stricter measures against gun violence. Afterwards I saw an article on HuffPost.com on how a man in Indiana threatened to kill his wife and then go into a local elementary school and shoot them up. Thankfully yesterday he was arrested and is being held on felony intimidation charges, but it still had me spooked. I mean, it’s enough to make you think this coming Friday really is the end of the world!

But when I got back home from my meditation class, I saw an article that said on the first day of the new Congress, Senator Dianne Feinstein of California plans to introduce a bill that’ll stop the sale of assault weapons to civilians. As she said on her campaign website, “Who needs these military-style assault weapons? Who needs an ammunition feeding device capable of holding 100 rounds? These weapons are not for hunting deer — they’re for hunting people.”

So true, Senator Feinstein. So true.

So at least someone in Washington has the guts to step up and speak out on the gun problem in the United States. I hope soon we can see some progress, and I wish Senator Feinstein the best of luck in getting this bill through Congress.

However this doesn’t mean we shouldn’t keep emailing our elected officials. On the contrary, we should email them more, because if a bill like this is going to get through Congress, it’s going to need all the popular support it can get, and I’m hoping you’ll help support it. So email away; I’ve got to email the senator herself and thank her for saying she’ll introduce this bill, because as you can tell it means a lot to me.

Have We Gotten The Message Yet?

Posted: December 16, 2012 in Politics and Leadership, Reflections, Social Activism
Tags: activism, government, gun control, politics and leadership, proper decisions

I open up my computer and what do I find? Two more stories about shootings or attempted shootings in the United States! Yes, I know, it’s unbelievable, right? The first happened in California in the parking lot of a mall (yes, another mall). A man apparently opened fire into the air and ground 50 shots before local police took him down. Thankfully no one was hurt. The second was a teenager in Oklahoma who was conspiring to shoot up and blow up his high school and was trying to get other kids in his school to help him. Thankfully he was caught before anything could happen.

But guess what? This all happened on Friday, December 14th, 2012! The same day as the Newtown massacre. Three separate shootings and attempted shootings, all in one bloody day! Am I the only one who’s getting the picture here? We’ve got a problem with guns, with people having machine guns, with people with obvious pyschological problems getting machine guns, and with people refusing to admit we have a problem and refusing to take care of it.

Now, I don’t believe God is trying to send us a message like Mike Huckabee does. For one thing, God usually sends a bona fide prophet who performs a few cool miracles before He does any sort of punishing, and usually that’s with a plague. But if He were to send a message, it would probably be something along the lines of, “You’ve got a problem with people using weapons to destroy the lives I’ve put on this Earth! Go and fix it now!” I think that’s a message we can all take to heart, right?

So I call on everyone reading this blog and living in America to contact your representative, your senator, your governor, hell, contact the President, just tell them they need to stop all this gun-toting craziness! This isn’t Rambo or The Terminator, where everything’s make-believe! It’s real-life, and there’s no Bruce Willis going to come swinging in and save us all! We have to do this ourselves, maybe by banning assault weapons in private homes or by changing confidentiality laws so that if a doctor/therapist fears a patient may commit a crime, they are obligated to report it.

We could also have special presentations in school on healthy ways to relieve yourself of stress and other problems, or assemblies to talk about mental illness and how to recognize the signs of it. Either one of these would be great strides to stopping gun violence. And like I always believe, a better education makes one less likely to commit a deadly crime, so if we fund education more and the Army less, it’d be a real help.

Thanks for reading, let’s get to work!

Oh, Now It’s Gotten Worse!

Posted: December 15, 2012 in Politics and Leadership, Reflections
Tags: government, gun control, politics and leadership, proper decisions

Yesterday I was quiet and remorseful, not my usual abrasive, combative self when it comes to gun issues. I felt that was what was needed for this tragedy, where a majority of the victims were children. They didn’t need someone to be angry and yelling on the Internet. What we needed was quiet reflection and prayer.

Not today, folks. Because let me tell you, I am pissed. Why, you ask? Well, here’s why: first, Mike Huckabee of FOX News said that the shooting in Newtown, Conneticut was the result of “systematically removing God” from the school system and that it wasn’t a surprise to him that the shooting occurred. First off Mr. Huckabee, authorities are now saying the shooter Adam Lanza probably suffered from a personality disorder. Personality disorders are the result of biology and genetics along with environmental, cultural, and social factors. Pointing to a lack of God in the public school system as the sole cause is counterproductive and just shows you’re trying to advance your evangelical/political point of view while using the death of children as a political tool. Unless you’re saying that God put the personality disorder in Lanza and/or told him to shoot up the school his mother worked at? Then you’re just evil, sir.

Also, there was a shooting at an Alabama hospital today. Let me repeat that: there was a shooting at an Alabama hospital today. Three people died. I know this’ll probably be eclipsed by the Newtown shooting, but I think the fact that three shootings in a week signals that we’re actually having problems and that guns play a large factor in it.

I mean, look at all the shootings that have happened in the United States this year alone:

Canton, Ohio
Aurora, Colorado
The Sikh temple in Wisconsin
The Empire State Building
Texas A&M
Chicago suburbs
The Oregon Mall
Newtown, Conneticut
The Alabama Hospital

Are we starting to get the picture here? That’s nine shootings, one of them in my state! I had a friend who comes from Canton, she knew the victims! Are we still going to say that there’s no gun problem here in the USA? Are we going to say that no new legislation should be put forth? Are we going to say these are isolated incidents?

HELL NO!

And pardon my French, but I’m angry right now. So now, more than ever, we need to sit down and talk about this ongoing problem and fix what’s wrong with our nation without the usual political bull and NRA grandstanding! As much as you may hate to admit it, there’s something wrong with this nation, and it needs fixing.

So get to work Congress! Do something about this!

Is This A Good Time To Start An Overdue Conversation?

Posted: December 11, 2012 in Politics and Leadership
Tags: government, politics and leadership, proper decisions

I was watching the latest NCIS episode when there was a breaking update. Apparently there was a shooting at a mall in Oregon today. Yes, while kids were jumping up and down as they waited in line to see Santa and mall cops were worried about an increase in shoplifting that always comes with sales and holdiays, some guy shot and murdered two people before getting killed himself. Also, the guy had a hunting rifle, which, if I remember correctly, you can take home with you the same day you buy it, no questions asked. Not even a background search.

Also, this is the fourth major shooting in the past five months! Aurora; Wisconsin; New York City; and now Oregon. All involve guns, all probably could have been avoided. AQnd yet how many state or national gun laws have been passed since this meshuggas started? That’d be none. And how many people have tried to start a discussion? Plenty of politicians, civilians, and one sports newscaster. And how many times have those discussions been shot down by opponents of gun control? Every time!

Seriously, I’m getting tired of ranting on this subject. so can we do something to stop the gun epidemic. Something that actually helps, something that actually doesn’t involve bickering along party lines. And come on, the election is over by a month and five days. It’s a good time right now to talk about safe, proactive ways to cut down on the amount of gun violence. And don’t say “less restrictions, leave them as are”; and don’t say we should allow the right to carry concealed arms, that’s what the police are for.

SeriouslyCongress, I’m telling you to do something about this, or be called inept senior citizens. Heck, the Supreme Court is beating you to gay marriage, might want to show you guys can actually function.

Solving the fiscal cliff problem might fix the bad image you guys have too, but gun control might also help your image.

Seriously, let’s talk. I’m on this blog and near the phone. It shouldn’t be hard to find the latter. You’re Washington DC, after all.

Are the One Million Moms Really Making A Fuss Over This?

Posted: December 9, 2012 in Reflections, Social Activism
Tags: activism, proper decisions, religious organizations

I was reading an article on HuffPost, and it said that One Million Moms, a conservative media watchdog that takes a very hard anti-gay stance, now says it is “moving on” from its protests of Ellen DeGeneres as the spokesperson for JC Penny. Apparently back in February, they had a hissy fit when Ellen was selected as the store’s spokesperson, but of course they didn’t base it over the fact that Ellen is a lesbian and a married one too; no, they said it was because JCP was a “family store” and having Ellen as spokesperson was promoting values that went against the traditional form of family. Now they say they are moving on, and will now boycott the store.

First off, I’m not so sure they have a million mothers in that organization. It’s a stupid point, but it’s a point nonetheless; how do we know there’s a million mothers in that organization? Second, what’s wrong with the non-traditional family? I grew up in a very nontraditional family, and even though I write scary stories, I turned out decent. In fact, my parents should be given medals because I got this far! Third, why are you protesting Ellen? OMM, there are worse things out there than a lesbian comedian with a wife and a talk show being the spokesperson for a major retail store.

But then again, not much of what the conservative right has problems with makes much sense to me. For example, I think children growing up in poverty and with substandard education is horrible. But organizations like OMM will complain that if we give those children more food stamps and educational funding, we will be fostering a culture of dependence and making these kids moochers for life. I think that sending jobs overseas and not giving them to hardworking Americans is cruel and that the jobs should stay in the United States, even if it costs the rich a little more to keep them here. What does OMM say? Probably that the people who lose these jobs will find jobs soon enough that are just as good as the old jobs, and it makes no sense to “punish” job creators.

So go ahead, OMM. Protest something that’s becoming more acceptable everyday. When you’re ready to tackle real problems in our country, let me know.

Write And Don’t Be Ashamed

Posted: November 17, 2012 in Living and Life, short story, Writing
Tags: college life, editing, Ohio State University, proper decisions, short story, writing

A classmate of mine in my creative writing class sent me (and the rest of the class) an email today. In the email, she said her mother and her aunt had wanted to see the short story she’d written, but the problem was her story dealt with subjects like drinking and random hook-ups. Guess what? Her mom and aunt don’t approve of those sorts of activities.

So my classmate–whom I’ll refer to as “Freya”, because that’s as far from her real name as you can get–whipped up a little short story that doesn’t involve any of that, and asks all her classmates to take a look and edit it if we can spare the time.

Naturally, my instinct as a writer is not to encourage this, so I write back to Freya and tell her that her mom and aunt should be proud that she’s grown into a strong, independent woman with her own thoughts and feelings, and they should be proud that she wrote a story with her own original ideas in them. If she has to be ashamed of her own work–which for romantic fiction set against the background of a wild college party, is actually a quality story–what’s the point of even writing the story in the first place? If Freya’s family doesn’t like the topics voiced in the story, then she should just tell them so, and leave it at that. If they still want to see it, then show it to them. These women might actually like it, and might also be fans of Fifty Shades of Grey, but are too proud to admit it.

I hope Freya get’s my message and doesn’t feel she needs to hide, because honestly, if a writer can’t be proud of their work, or at least admit they wrote such subjects, what’s there for the future of writing and fiction? Be proud of your work writers; it’s your brainchild, after all. You shouldn’t be ashamed of it, no matter what objectionable material within. Instead, shout it to the world, “I wrote a story and it has stuff people don’t like in it but I don’t care.”

If I didn’t do that, why would I bother writing a novel with a serial killer in it?

“The Rape Thing”? Are You High?!

Posted: November 2, 2012 in Living and Life, Politics and Leadership, Reflections
Tags: college life, government, Ohio State University, politics and leadership, proper decisions

I decide to see what’s new in the world before I go to bed and what am I greeted with? Another politician has said something about abortion that’s not only ignorant, but sounds like he’s trivializing the victim’s needs. John Koster, a GOP candidate for the Washington State House of Representatives, said that he only supports abortion when a woman’s life is in danger, and then said “Incest is so rare…but the whole rape thing?…how does putting more violence on a woman’s body and taking an innocent life make it all better?”

What is he smoking?

And his spokespeople may be saying that this guy takes rape seriously, but calling rape a “thing”? That’s not taking it seriously. And violence on a woman’s body? How would you know? Did you ask women if they think abortion is violent? Or did you never consider that maybe carrying the product of a rape to term is a form of violence in itself, it’s so traumatizing to women?

Honestly, I’m getting really tired of male politicians saying these things about women’s bodies and rape and abortion. “Legitimate rape”; “God intended it”; “the rape thing”. When are these men going to realize that saying this sort of stuff is asking for trouble? Really, learn your lessons already.

This brings up another topic I’d like to mention: colleges and rape. I’ve also recently read some articles about how colleges try to cover up rapes and blame the victims…told from the perspectives of the victims themselves. In every case, victims were told by the college administrators and people who worked for them things that confused me.

For example, one doctor asked why a victim didn’t report her rape for months. Apparently to the doctor it didn’t seem logical. Hello? Since when does anyone do anything that makes sense when they’ve just been traumatized and put into deep shock? And asking why a girl is saying she was raped when before the incident she liked the guy and wanted to sleep with him? Well, let’s see…um…he was charming at the coffee shop, but when I told him I wasn’t comfortable doing that after the third date and he just pressed on…are you kidding me?!

I love higher education. I wish everyone had a shot at it. But it’s also, unfortunately, big business. And no business wants the nickname “Rape University”. Now, some colleges do rape prevention, treatment and prosecution better than others. I couldn’t find any statistics for OSU, but I’ve seen posters in several buildings and my dorm about what constitutes healthy relationships and what doesn’t. I’ve also seen classes hosted inside dorms instructing girls on how to prevent being attacked and how to defend one’s self when being attacked. And the Wexner Medical Center has a Sexual Assault/Domestic Violence Unit, so that’s definitely a good sign. And I don’t know how often the disciplinary board takes on sexual misconduct cases, but our student code of conduct defines sexual misconduct as tightly as most police officers do. Got to give them credit for that.

Some colleges however, don’t excell in this capacity. On the contrary, they’ll do anything to make their problems go away, even if it means making the victims suffer. Amherst College is a pretty bad offender. There’s even an article about it, which links to another girl’s experience prior to the article (http://acvoice.com/2012/10/23/surviving-at-amherst-college/). I must say, it’s disheartening to see schools put their reputations before their students. If they’d just prosecute these cases for what they are–rape, and not by any other name–then there reputations wouldn’t suffer, they’d grow with the knowledge that the school does not tolerate rape or any other form of sexual assault or misconduct.

So to the politicians and schools, do us all a favor. Stop belittling what women go through. Help them get the services and closure they need. Get educated on the facts. Don’t try to make the problem go away or insist it’s not as big as people think. And certainly don’t say women should live with what happened to them because of a fetus that’s nervous system is underdeveloped is in their uterus or that because of alcohol or they came forward after a certain amount of time they can’t be helped.

Rape is rape. It’s that simple. Preventing it and bringing justice for the victims should not be.

“Are You Autistic Or Something?”

Posted: October 28, 2012 in Living and Life, Reflections
Tags: college life, proper decisions

That was the question I was posed last week. I was telling a guy about some of the stuff I’d published and some of the stuff that will be published and some of the stuff I hope will be published in the coming months. As I told him, I could just see the awe on his face growing, which made me happy because it meant I might have a new reader to be interested in my work, and what writer doesn’t like people to read his work?

And then the guy asks me, “Are you autistic or something?” Yes, he said that to me.

Now, I do have what’s called Pervasive Developmental Disabilities Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS for short), which is a type of disorder where an individual has some of the markers of autism or Asperger Syndrome but not enough to qualify for either of them, and I don’t mind sharing that with people if the subject comes up. And I did tell this guy that, but I was a little taken aback. I mean come on, who asks that?

When I asked him why he asked me, he said, “You’re just doing so amazing things. You just got to have something.”

So apparently he subscribes to the idea that all great artists either have a condition or a trauma. There is some evidence to support that theory: Stephen King saw his friend run over by a train; van Gogh was mentally ill; Sylvia Plath was bipolar; and Anne Rice lost her father to illness. But not all artists are traumatized or have some mental or social problem. My high school art teacher, who is also a good friend and will be doing the cover to Reborn City, has no traumas or disorders, at least as far as I know, and she’s well-known as an artist and jewelry-maker in Columbus. And Lady Gaga may be a little strange, but not because of anything in her past or brain chemistry.

Amd look at me! I may have both a childhood trauma and a condition, but I don’t let them define me, or attribute them as the sole reasons why I write or write as well as I do. Maybe they help, but so does a lot of other factors, especially experience and hard work!

Well, I ended that conversation as soon as possible and left. I didn’t want him asking any other strange questions to me. It made me wonder though: are other people going to ask that question to me? Has anyone else ever been posed that question? For both, I hope not!

If you have any thoughts, please tell me. I’d love your opinion.

Rami Ungar The Writer

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