Archive for the ‘short story’ Category

What Happened Saturday Night: Third Draft Finished

Posted: December 6, 2014 in Living and Life, Progress Report, Reflections, Scary Stuff, short story, Writing
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I’m not sure how I did it. I’m not sure I care to know how I did it. I just know that I finished the third draft of “What Happened Saturday Night”, formerly known as “Frauwolf”. And boy, what a writing marathon that was! I just didn’t stop writing.

After hearing the criticisms of my classmates, I went through the story, adjusting the first half or so (the half they really liked) and then completely rewrote everything past page 7 or so (the half they disliked). Throughout the editing and rewriting I tried to keep in mind that, even though this was a werewolf story, it was also a story about two people who really care about each other. A story about human interaction, in other words. And isn’t that all literature? It’s about how humans interact with each other and/or their environment. Even in ghost stories, it’s about human interaction, about confronting our fear of mortality and the afterlife.

I’d do well to remember that for future stories, and not try to create an amazing, complicated universe before working on the human aspect. Perhaps now that I’ve written it down I will.

Anyway, I also played around with some of the already apparent symbolism in the story–using a werewolf as a metaphor for awakening to sexuality, I wonder how many others have used that one? Probably a few–as well as switching the story to present tense. I actually had originally planned to do the second draft in present tense, seeing as Rose is written that way as well, but at some point I slipped back into my standard past tense. Well, it’s closer to what I’d planned, and the ending works better now than it did in the second draft, so I’m hoping my teacher approves.

And speaking of endings, when I was typing out the last words of the story, my iTunes started playing “Va, pensiero”, an Italian opera piece as sung by Russell Watson. It’s such a beautiful piece, and it seemed to fit the ending of the story so well.  I think that’s a good sign for this draft.

Anyway, I sent it off to my teacher. She’ll review it and let me know what she thinks. Hopefully I’ll get some good feedback on this story. Because of the LGBT themes, I figure I could send it to a magazine that specializes in that sort of literature. I’ve already found a few that might be good fits. Fingers crossed that they like what I send them.

Well, I’m tired, it’s very late, and I’ve got more work to do tomorrow (still got a thesis to get through, after all). I’ll see you guys in the morning.  Goodnight my Followers of Fear. Don’t let the werewolves bite.

What Happened Saturday Night: Critique Day

Posted: December 3, 2014 in Living and Life, Progress Report, Scary Stuff, short story, Writing
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You may also know this story by its original title, Frauwolf. It’s still the same story as well, about a girl who’s a werewolf and who is in a relationship with another girl. And its second draft got critiqued in my creative writing class.

Luckily this time I won’t have to rewrite the whole damn story again, or I might seriously turn into a werewolf myself and go on a rampage  (boy, wouldn’t that make for an interesting horror movie). My classmates found this draft much easier to read and felt that the first half was awesome, that the language was superb and that the emotions between the two main characters felt real. Most of all they were glad I’d changed the story from a crazy fast-paced psycho-drama that left little time to linger on the actual story and made it more about the characters themselves.

The thing they didn’t like is that near the end of the story I add a new character, who happens to be a psychopath, and it just takes the story in a bad direction. Well, in my defense I had only so many days to finish the new draft and I was pressed for time, so when I got stuck I went with what first came to mind.

In any case, I only have about half a short story to rewrite rather than a full short story, and I have to turn in a third draft by next Wednesday. God help me, because I have an eight-page Shakespeare paper due the day before and I still have three and a half pages left. Plus I’m still figuring out where to go with this short story of mine. Boy, is my life crazy!

Well, I’m going to turn in. I’ve had a long day, I’m exhausted, and I need my rest if I’m going to tackle either of these tomorrow. Wish me luck Followers of Fear, because I have a feeling I’m going to need all the luck I can get. Goodnight, everybody.

Frauwolf: Second Draft Finished

Posted: November 16, 2014 in Living and Life, short story, Writing
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Boy, has this short story been something of a saga for me. For this second draft, not only did I have to go back twice to redo it because I didn’t like where it was going, but I also changed the name of the short story about…six times? I settled with “What Happened Saturday Night” after a while as the new title. So maybe this post should be called “What Happened Saturday Night: Finished”.

Anywho, for those who don’t know, for my creative writing class I have to turn in two original short stories and a revised short story for the class to critique. Having previously done a short story about fallen angels and one about a woman who turns into a wolf, I decided to do a revision of the latter story. And just like the first draft, where I went back several times because the plot was going nowhere fast, I had to go back several times on this one. The first time was because I realized the story’s ending would resemble that of a previous story, and I didn’t want to be repeating myself. The second time I added in a cult element, but then things got really complicated and I decided I didn’t need that.

So for this third round, I decided to simplify things, go in a new direction I hadn’t thought of before, and see what I got. I also turned off the Internet so I wouldn’t get distracted (it worked). And finally, four days before it was due, I finished the new draft of “Frauwolf”, which is now called “What Happened Saturday Night”, and I incorporated a lot of the suggestions I got from my peers. So now it’s done, with a little over five-thousand words. A little wordy should I try to get it published, but I’m sure after my next critique in two weeks I’ll get some great suggestions on how to improve it and maybe trim it down if necessary. It still incorporates the main elements though: a girl who turns into a werewolf, and her relationship with her lover, also a woman. Can’t argue about that.

For now though, I’m tired and I want to go to bed. I’ve got a big week starting tomorrow, including midterms on Tuesday and Wednesday, so I’d rather be well-rested for those.

I’ll try and blog later this week, my Followers of Fear. Until then, a terrifying sleep, and a good week to you all.

Frauwolf: Critique Day

Posted: November 5, 2014 in Living and Life, Reflections, short story, Writing
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Today in my creative writing class it was my turn to get critiqued. And as you may recall, my short story was about a woman who turned into a werewolf. Or as she preferred because of her gender, frauwolf, which became the title of the story.Unlike other stories, I thought this first draft was a piece of crap. And it was, too. But it was the only draft I could finish, so it was the draft I ended up sticking with. And last week I bought sugar cookies to bribe my classmates with, so that when they tore my story into little pieces they would be nice about it.

Well, the bribe didn’t work. Apparently cookies that are about 90% sugar don’t work on college students, because  only half of them got eaten, and mostly by the students with sweet tooths. But they were nice while they tore my story apart, I’ll give them that.

Anyway, the biggest problems with “Frauwolf” seem to be that I throw way too much in and that the readers felt yanked along by all that was happening. Well, that’s not surprising, considering it’s me writing this story. I like to write novels, especially long, expansive novels that may in fact involve into series. So I tried to add a huge amount of stuff into 5,000 words and the result was a story that was rushed along so as to get to everything happening in the story. The result is an overly-complicated and insane story that deviates from what I originally intended (as you read two posts ago, that was the problem I had with Rose).

My classmates also had some trouble with the relationship portrayed in the story. They couldn’t get why my main character’s girlfriend still stuck around with her, among other things. Well, I guess that makes sense. I don’t delve that deep into the foundation of the relationship. For the next draft, I think I will do that thoug.

And speaking of next draft, I’ve got one more story to turn in this semester, and it has to be a revision of a previous story. I’m thinking I’ll work on this one, maybe change the setting and the story line and see what comes of it. Besides, I’m not nearly satisfied with this story as I should be, so I’ll put off editing my other short story, “Evil Began in a Bar”, until another time. Besides, my critique gave me some great ideas of where to go with this story, so I really want to see what I can do with them. I might even write something worth publishing.

I’ll let you know what comes of all this editing, and what my classmates say at my final critique. In the meantime, I’ve got to get dinner ready before my evening class, so that’s all for now. Have a great day, my Followers of Fear.

Frauwolf: Finished

Posted: October 13, 2014 in Living and Life, short story, Writing
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I just finished the second short story I’ll be submitting to my creative writing class. This one is titled “Frauwolf”, and it’s about a woman who turns into a werewolf–or as she prefers, frauwolf, meaning “woman wolf”. Werewolf mean “man wolf”, so my character thought she’d coin a term for the ladies out there. Anyway, she turns into a werewolf, but at a certain point she can’t tell whether she’s actually changing into a wolf creature or if she’s nuts, and I write it so I make it hard for even the reader to figure it out either.

This story’s also significant because the main character and her partner are both women, and it’s been a long while since I’ve written any characters that were LGBT (I originally intended to make 011 from Reborn City gay, but I didn’t think it fit with the story I was trying to create, so I mase him just creepy and sadistic and possibly asexual). I’m wondering if having two women in love will influence how anyone sees or likes this story. As far as I’m aware, non-hetero couples are still not very prominent in horror fiction, and it’s common for those that are to die pretty early on or be shunted to the side where they won’t make that much impact in the story. Perhaps having them at the forefront will make a difference.

This particular short story was probably one of the hardest I’ve ever had to work with ever. I had to go back three times to the beginning and start over because I didn’t like the way the story was going. Thus, about two or three weeks that could have been devoted to my thesis were devoted to this particular short story. Finally on the fourth try I came out with a version I happened to like.

Still, considering how I’m more suited for writing novels, I doubt “Frauwolf” will come away from critique day without a lot of comments and plenty of edits to make. I say, bring it on. I’m pretty sure there’s plenty of stuff I could do to improve the story, and if I decide to try to publish it in a magazine or something, plenty of the story I could cut out and rewrite to be shorter. And considering how much I love this story’s concept, I’m really hoping to find ways to improve it.

In any case, I’m putting this story away until it’s actually time to deal with it. I’ve still got a thesis to work on and I’ve taken too long of a break from it to get this thing done. If I finish my homework early (and that happens a lot on Tuesdays, for some reason), I’ll get right on the next chapter. Wish me luck, because I’ve got a meeting with my advisor on Wednesday and I don’t want to tell him I have nothing new to send him!

Well, I’m exhausted, so I’m going to rest and relax till bed. You have a good night, my Followers of Fear. Sweet nightmares to you all.

Self-Pub Authors: Following Up on Submissions

Posted: October 11, 2014 in Journalism, short story, Writing
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It’s been a while, but I just posted an article on Self-Published Authors Helping Other Authors. This latest article is about following up on submissions to magazines after a lot of time has passed and you haven’t heard anything from them. I thought this would be a good article since my last one was about submitting to magazines in general. I’m hoping for those whose stories are stuck in a wait pile, this will prove very helpful and that they’ll be able to use the advice I give to maybe get their stories read and even published.

If you get the chance, please check out the article. And if you are so inclined, check out the rest of the site. Self-Published Authors Helping Other Authors is a great resource for indie authors and even traditionally-published authors on how to write, edit, publish, and market in a cost efficient manner. I’ve found it very helpful, and I’m sure everyone else can too.

Well, I published my two or three articles. Now I’m going to work on a short story till bed. You all have a good night, my Followers of Fear. And if I get the chance, I’ll post something else tomorrow. Hopefully something spooky.

The Quiet Game: Perfect for the Month of October

Posted: October 11, 2014 in Living and Life, Scary Stuff, short story, Writing
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tqg cover

If you’re a fan of horror and you’re looking for something scary to read this October, then you’re probably looking for something in the vein of the masters: Anne Rice, Stephen King, Edgar Allen Poe, HP Lovecraft. If you’re a fan of horror and you’re looking for something scary to read this October and would like to check out something by a lesser known or independent author, then maybe I could persuade you to check out the first book I ever published, The Quiet Game: Five Tales To Chill Your Bones.

Over the year and three months since The Quiet Game has been published, people have checked out this creepy little tome, and judging by the reviews they’ve come away good and scared. Here are what readers have been saying:

This is the first time I’ve read any of Rami’s stories. I was very impressed with the wide variety of stories and the way he wove the paranormal into each piece. Paranormal is not something I usually read and I enjoyed this collection very much. The collection reminded me of the Twlight Zone. The descriptions were especially well developed. Keep on writing Rami!

–Arthur siegal

Imagine if you will a young Stephen King penning dark scenarios inspired by his youth, and what you get is this anthology. Through this collection of short stories, Rami Ungar brings us into the world of dark urges, childhood traumas, ghosts, phantoms, and dark psychological thrillers. An inspired creation, and definitely a good intro to this indie author’s world!
 –Matthew Williams
5 wonderfully crafted tales! I purchased this as an eBook originally and put off reading it for quite a while, I really wish I hadn’t waited. Sometimes when one purchases a collection of short stories you expect some of them to be less entertaining or of lower quality than the others, but none of these disappoint. Well worth the money, especially considering after you read each story the author gives you creative insight into what inspired him to write each tale, which is really wonderful.
 –Jeff D.

I’ve often mentioned that writing short stories is not my forte in the least, but at least with these stories people seem to really enjoy them. So if you’d like to see if these stories will spice up your October something frightening, check out The Quiet Game: Five Tales To Chill Your Bones, available in paperback and e-book from Amazon, Smashwords, and even Barnes & Noble.

And if you like what you read, or if you hate it, please let me know, either in a comment or in a review. Good or bad, I love feedback on my work. It encourages me to keep writing no matter what.
Hope you’re having a spooky month so far. I know I am, Followers of Fear.

Evil Began in a Bar: Critique Day

Posted: September 24, 2014 in Living and Life, Scary Stuff, short story, Writing
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0471a-fallenangels

I would’ve written this post earlier in the day, but…well, you probably can guess.

Anyway, today was my first critique day in my creative writing workshop. There were three others in the class getting their short stories critiqued, and mine was the third. And it was one of the best critiques I’ve ever had, because they pointed out numerous problems with “Evil Began in a Bar” and gave some really good suggestions on how to improve it. Yeah, the best way to judge a critique is not on how much they praise or hate a story, but on what the critics say that will help you better the story.

As I said, my classmates felt there was a lot that could be improved upon with “Evil Began in a Bar”, which is a retelling of the story of the Fall a la Milton (or a la Ungar, I guess) Some of the big ones were:

  • The tone seemed to shift wildly between dark and comical, serious and light.
  • They couldn’t tell whether this was a dystopia story or a religious fantasy.
  • People unfamiliar with the story of the Fall might be confused by this.

I think I’ve mentioned this before, but short stories are not my greatest strength. I’m much better at novels.

Still, there’s a bright side to this. After hearing from my classmates and talking to my teacher after class (in which she agreed with me on my predilection for novels: “You seem to be very expansive in your writing”), I got a better idea of what I can do to modify this story. And like a lot of short stories I seem to be working with lately, this one is going to be rewritten entirely during the second phase. I’m fine with it, really. At this point I’m becoming very used to it, and I like where I could go with this short story on the second draft. I just hope I can keep it under five-thousand words, or it’ll be more difficult to get it published in a magazine.

But before I do any revisions, I’m going to work on the next short story I’m going to write for my creative writing class. That one’s due on the Wednesday before Halloween, so you know I’m going to be bringing the terror. And as the hint I gave a while back indicates, this time it’s going to be a werewolf story. Though if I’m able to pull it off, it’ll be a very unusual werewolf story.

Here’s what’s coming next from creepy ol’ me.

And after the werewolf story…well, I may resubmit “Evil Began in a Bar” for the third time around, when I submit a revision. I guess it’ll depend on how my classmates react to the werewolf story, and how much work I have going on then, among other things. In any case, wish me luck with this and all the other projects I’ve got going on at the moment. It’s because of your support that I’m able to keep working even when stressed out.

Oh, and before I forget, this evening starts Rosh Hashanah, the Jewish New Year. According to the Jewish calendar, the Earth is now 5775 years old. So for everyone out there, I hope you have a happy and healthy new year, and I hope you’re inscribed in the Book of Life for the coming year. Also, if I did anything to upset or offend you this past year, I hope you’ll forgive me, because I’ve already forgiven you.

Have a good night, my Followers of Fear!

Evil Began in a Bar: Finished

Posted: September 4, 2014 in Living and Life, short story, Writing
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Man, am I in a good mood lately. Semester’s going well, work hasn’t been too difficult lately, and…oh yeah. I finished the first of two short stories for my creative writing class today. This one, called Evil Began in a Bar, involves a meeting in a dive bar in a magnificent city about certain decisions the city’s leader, known as Father, has made recently. As you get further along in the story, something extraordinary is revealed about the protagonist Luca, and the rest of the characters as well. That something extraordinary has a lot to do with this picture, which was the hint I used when I talked about my creative writing class the other day:

0471a-fallenangels

Can you guess what it is?

I’m actually pretty amazed at how quickly I finished this short story. It usually takes me a week or so to finish a short story, usually longer. I got this one done in three days, a record by my standards. The last time this happened was back when I was writing Addict for The Quiet Game, which I finished in a single day. I’m thinking that’s not just because I found the story exciting to write, but because of changes I’ve been making to my diet these days. I’ve noticed I’m a bit less twitchy and easily distracted, and feeling a lot more energetic too. Maybe I’ll be able to significantly speed up my writing process in the future. Who knows?

I’m really interested to hear what my class will say when they read this story. Like I’ve explained before, my teacher is looking for fiction that is interesting and doesn’t conform to conventions, and I think this story fulfills both of those requirements. It’s that little twist near the middle of the story that explains everything and throws it all into perspective that I think will really get them, but I wonder how many of them will figure it out beforehand.

Anyway, that’s all I have for now. I’ll hopefully have a chance to write a blog post tomorrow, but right now I’ve got to get ready for bed. Goodnight, my Followers of Fear. Have some pleasant nightmares tonight.

Self-Pub Authors: Submitting Short Stories to Magazines

Posted: September 1, 2014 in Journalism, Living and Life, short story, Writing
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I’ve just written up and published my latest article from Self-Published Authors Helping Other Authors. Today’s article is Submitting Short Stories to Magazines. I figured that since a lot of authors, both traditional and independent, publish or attempt to publish short stories in magazines and anthologies, why not write an article that aims to help authors accomplish just that. And I plan to follow up on that article with another article about the short story submission process very soon, if I can, so keep an eye out for that.

And if you do decide to check out the article, please check out the rest of the website. Self-Pub Authors comes with many helpful articles written by indie authors for indie authors that aim to make self-publishing easy and cost effective. And you never know what sort of articles you’ll find on this website that could prove helpful in getting you some awesome reviews or a ton of readers or something.

That’s all for now. Have a good evening, my Followers of Fear. I certainly think I will.

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