Archive for the ‘Living and Life’ Category

Amazon BreakThrough Novel Award 2014: Reborn City Made It To The Second Round!

Posted: March 18, 2014 in Living and Life, Novel, Progress Report, Writing
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I’ve been meaning to blog about this since I found out the good news this morning. Unfortunately I had work, and then I had classes, and then I had a 2-hour orientation for my study abroad trip and then I came home and started on homework and laundry, and these next two days will probably be crazy as well, and–whack!–I just slapped myself to stop me from rambling on. My friends are right, I would make an interesting late-night host or sitcom character.

Back to the point of this post (if we were ever at the point of this post to begin with): I submitted Reborn City to the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award in the Fantasy/Science Fiction/Horror category about a month ago. I figured that it was free-of-charge, that it couldn’t hurt to try, and that even if I didn’t get a cash prize, after a certain round or two you got reviews from the judges. At the very least I might get a few more people to read RC. So why the heck not? I submitted RC through my account on Createspace, and I went back to my life.

This morning, keenly aware that today was the day that the results would be released letting authors know who got to the second round, I went online to find out if I was among the lucky winners. I scrolled through the list of 400 authors and novels in my category, trying to find my name and RC‘s title among them. And on the third or fourth page, my name popped out at me. Rami Ungar. Reborn City. I’d passed the first round.

I was ecstatic! I’d figured that since it was my first novel, RC probably wouldn’t make it past the first round. Sure, I’d gotten some amazing reviews off Amazon and from friends and family who were in the middle of the book, but I was sure I was too inexperienced an author to get to the second round. Well, just goes to show that authors can be the worst judge of their own work sometimes. RC passed.

Now that the first hurdle has been overcome, it’s time to get ready for the second round. I believe instead of an excerpt of RC, the full manuscript is required, so I’m going to try to upload it tonight. I don’t believe I’ll get to the finals or win the whole contest (like I said, it’s my first book and I’m not as good as I could be yet), but I’d like to at least get to the quarterfinals. At that stage they give reviews of your book, and any feedback, positive or negative, is welcome.

Well, I’ve finally blogged about it, so I’m going to get everything else out of my way so I can focus on getting to the quarterfinals (which are announced on April 11). I’m so excited, and I’m extremely grateful to be given this opportunity to possibly expand RC to a wider audience and to get some constructive feedback from experienced professionals. Wish me luck, Followers of Fear!

Katniss vs. Zahara

Posted: March 16, 2014 in Living and Life, Novel, Reflections, Writing
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I got The Hunger Games: Catching Fire on DVD on Friday and watched it this afternoon. If I were to do a review, I’d say it was a very good adaptation of a book I absolutely hated for a number of reasons. However, I’m not writing this post as a review for Catching Fire. I’m writing this post because, after I took the DVD out and went to make my dinner, I thought to myself, “There is such a difference between Katniss Everdeen and Zahara.”

And indeed, there is a great difference between the two characters. And I’m not just talking about upbringing, religious identification, and their experiences. I think the biggest differences between Katniss and Zahara is their access to choices in their lives. (Okay, there’s also major differences in character development, but since all three books of The Hunger Games are out and only one book of the Reborn City series is out, I won’t go into that lest I spoil something).

In THG, Katniss rarely has any sort of choice in what she can or can’t do. Except for certain memorable instances, Katniss follows a script that someone else wrote, whether that be the Capitol or someone associated with the Capitol, or District 13 and someone in the rebellion. Sure, the moments when she gets a chance to make her own choices are pretty momentous. She volunteered for the Hunger Games, she nearly committed suicide using poison berries, and she killed President Coin in an act of revenge. But other than those moments, she’s mostly dancing to the tune of someone else’s fiddle. And she’s either unaware of it or she’s aware of it and so pissed off about it.

Zahara, on the other hand, has a little more leeway. When I wrote Reborn City and started planning its sequels, I obviously wasn’t planning on writing about Zahara’s choices. But after she’s forced to join the Hydras, she does find that she has a bit of choice in the events that occur later on in the story. And those choices do end up affecting the Hydras in several ways, whether  it involve a gang war about to go wrong, or by a simple encouragement that changes the way someone thinks. And as the series goes on, Zahara will get to make more choices, some of which will have greater effects than the previous ones she’s made.

Why the difference? Well, I guess you’d have to ask the authors. In addition to wanting to create a story that was a commentary on both our addictions to violence and reality TV, Suzanne Collins also wanted (I’m assuming) to allow readers to relate to the feeling that our lives are not our own. We’ve all been there, had those moments when we felt our lives weren’t our own, where we felt like our lives are being directed by someone else. Maybe our parents, our employers, our teachers, our government, our spouses, etc. Basically we have to subordinate our lives to the needs or whims of others. This speaks to plenty of people, particularly teenagers and young adults who are constantly pressured to fulfill the wishes and pressures of the adults around them. I can only guess as to why Mrs. Collins wanted to weave that theme into her trilogy, or if she even realized what she was weaving in until it was already there. What is obvious that Katniss exemplifies that theme of lack of control over one’s life, and it’s part of why people identify with her.

With Zahara and RC on the other hand, the intentions were very different. I realized early on in writing a novel about street gangs that people in gangs or in slums or broken families or several other similar situations that they feel like they can’t leave the situations they’re in. This attitude, which seems to perpetuate itself over generations in a terrible self-fulfilling prophecy, horrified me. Imagine people who didn’t try to change their horrible lives because they felt that trying was impossible, that it would only lead to pain and regret. Where they were was where they belonged. Throughout the trilogy I try to fight that belief through the travails of Zahara and the Hydras, making choices and fighting for not only their lives, but also to live their lives as they wish.

So I guess this difference in opportunity and choice for Katniss Everdeen and Zahara Bakur really just boils own to the intentions of the authors when we were writing our stories. I strove to write about teens fighting against a world that oppresses them and tries to control them, while Mrs. Collins seems to have written a story about a world where, among other things, the lives of others are maddeningly not their own.

It’s interesting what the intentions of the autor can do for a single story, isn’t it?

That’s all for now. Tomorrow school starts up again, so I’m heading to bed to get ready for the big day. Goodnight, Followers of Fear, and have a great week.

Conversations With Becket

Posted: March 7, 2014 in Author Interciew, Journalism, Living and Life, Novel, Reflections, Writing
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becket

Today’s interview is with indie author Becket, whose books include The Blood Vivicanti series and the Key The Steampunk Vampire Girl books, including the recently released The Tower Tomb of Time. When not writing, Becket works for author Anne Rice and is supplementing his education with a degree in psychology.

I had the chance to email Becket and learn a little bit about him, his books, and what it’s like to work for Anne Rice. It was definitely an enjoyable correspondence.

RU: So Becket, you’ve had quite the interesting life, working as an author, working for an author, and at one point you were a Benedictine monk. Makes me curious about what else you’ve done, so could you give us a brief history of yourself?

Becket: I entered the seminary when I was 21 because I wanted to deepen my relationship with God as well as be a minister of hope, faith, and love. I spent three years in the seminary, during which time I also finished my BA in music composition. Then in the summer of 2000, I entered a Benedictine monastery, St. Joseph Abbey in Covington, LA. The spiritual charisma of the monastic life appealed to my personality type. The monks lived a very silent life, guided by two principals of work and prayer. During my first year in the monastery, Anne Rice requested a harpsichord for a book signing in New Orleans. We monks had a very nice one; and the abbot asked me to deliver it because of my musical background – I had studied the instrument in college, along with several others. That was when Anne and I first met. We developed an email rapport over the next few years while I was earning my MA in theology. When I completed my degree in 2005, I decided that it was time for me to re-enter lay life and, needing a job, I emailed Anne, asking her fi she had a job on her staff for a former monk with a few degrees. She replied with a job offer. I’ve been with Anne ever since, studying the craft of writing under her guidance while also earning an MS in psychology.

RU: What is it like, working for Anne Rice? Besides the amount of jealousy you must receive from fans including myself, I mean.

Becket: What is it like, working for Anne Rice?

Working for Anne Rice is like working for a childhood hero. I first read Anne’s books when I was a teen. Being a lonely adolescent, an outsider, Anne’s words spoke to me powerfully – because her words have a wonderful way of showing empathy for the outsider/reader. Many days she and I talk about literature and the book publishing business. It is a continual learning experience. Every day I learn something helpful and significant about my writing, about the publishing of my own books, about my own capacity for problem-solving, about many things. But every day is a new experience because every day I’m presented with a new challenge. Before I started working for Anne, I had never used Photoshop. So to assist her as best as I could, I learned many new skills, such as photography, shooting video, proper lighting, sound engineering, etc. I also learned several programs in the Adobe Creative Suite, namely Photoshop, Illustrator, and even Premier Pro and After Effects. Most of those programs I use every day, whether it is creating an app for Anne, or posting an image, or editing a video for Youtube. And today all those programs have helped me greatly in my own work; they are invaluable book publishing tools. A successful indie author cannot live on Word alone.

RU: Tell me about it. iMovie and Photoshop have been great tools in the past for me. Now, you’re new book is the latest adventure for your character Key the Steampunk Vampire Girl. Tell us about her and the new book.

Becket: Key’s new adventure picks up where the last book left off: Key has just escaped from the Dungeon of Despair. Yet unlike the last book, which takes place over the course of 250 years, the course of this book happens in a single night. Key gets to do what she has not done in over two centuries: She gets to explore the City of the Dead. She rides a Hobbeetle, she meets the Worm King, she visits the Grave of the Grim Goblin, whose not as grim or dead as some people might think, and she does so much more! Ultimately she finds herself at the Tower Tomb of Time, which allows her to visit the moment when she was first made a vampire. She discovers the mystery behind her mom and dad’s disappearance, as well as the reason she was taken to the City of the Dead in the first place. In other words, The Tower Tomb of Time explores questions that were raised in The Dungeon of Despair.

RU: Some people would hesitate to write a vampire novel these days when most people associate vampires with Twilight. What made you decide to write about vampires?

Becket: Before there was Twilight, there was Anne Rice. She was ground breaking (and indeed she still is) in the sense that she made the vampire a Byronic hero – someone whom we could easily identify with. Moreover, being a vampire isn’t the story of Key the Steampunk Vampire Girl – which is fundamentally the case with Bella, the heroine of Twilight. Bella actively seeks to become a blood drinker. Key, on the other fang, like Anne’s Louis or Lestat, never wanted to be a vampire at all. Becoming what she is happened to her, and then lots more terrible things happened to her, and so she has to make the best of her situation. That kind of narrative ambience is what I strove to create when I wrote Key. I hope readers will associate with her story and say to himself or herself, “I know how she feels being in the Dungeon of Despair, or confronting the Worm King, or revisiting a past that was hitherto forsaken.” Additionally, I hope readers would also feel inspired by Key’s successes and victories over personal demons. Key’s story is a coming of age story.

RU: What is your writing process like for you?

Becket: Generally my process begins with an idea, which usually comes to me while I’m writing another book. I write down that idea, and if it stays with me for some time, I will jot down notes about potential plot development, prose style, themes, and so on. When I finish one novel, I immediately begin another; there is no waiting for me. I write every day. It is a routine. And the routine for starting new novels is grounded in two goals: (1) the long-term goal of my book, and (2) the short-term goal of my daily writing. My long-term goal is the size of the book that I want to write, and I generally determine that by comparing it with other books. For instance, I know that Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland is about 25,000 words. So if I am seeking to create a children’s story, such as Key the Steampunk Vampire Girl, I will make the long-term goal of my first draft comparable to 25,000 words. My short-term goal is the amount of words that I will write in a day. On average my goal is at least 1000 words a day; usually I write more, often twice as much; and some times I write fewer words. The point isn’t perfection: It’s progress. As long as I am writing, I am coming closer to the completion of a book.

RU: I admire your tenacity. Now what are some tips you might have for other self-published authors, such as myself, on writing and getting your work out there?

Becket: The beauty of indie-publishing is in the word “indie” – independent. This is a quintessential word to keep in mind because, if a writer gets embroiled in the industry of professional book publishing, that writer would lose some degree of control. The writer would usually not be able to control, for instance, interior or exterior formatting. In other words, you would probably have little to say in the creation of your book jacket. I can’t tell you how many times I have heard professionally published authors complain about their book jacket, how it does not look like the story they told. Other authors have complained about the struggle they have with their editor or copy editor, how important words will be edited out, or how sometimes sentences or pages completely rewritten. There are some authors who want to be controlled like that. And that is good! Great books have been written with the help of excellent editors. But finding such an editor is like finding love in your life: It usually happens when you least expect it. Being an indie-author means controlling every element of your work. I like this, not micro-managing, but being purposeful and meaningful with every element that I produce.

RU: I love that independence too. It’s gone well for me. So what’s next for you, Becket?

Becket: The Blood Vivicanti Parts 5 and 6 will come in March and April. And after that, I will be publishing a book titled, The Door to Heaven, which is about a boy whose life is changed forever when he encounters an old man’s face on the doorknob to the Door to Heaven.

RU: That “Door To Heaven” sounds very Stephen King-ish. Last question: If you were stranded on a desert island and could only take three books with you, which books would you take?

Becket: Well, I am a man of faith and prayer, so I would probably take the ESV Bible (because I like that translation), The Imitation of Christ, and a book of blank pages, so that my mind could fill it up with my own stories.

RU: I love it when authors say they want to bring a blank notebook with them. Shows their true writing spirit, in some ways. Well, thanks for joining us, Becket, and best of luck to you.

If you’d like to find out more about Becket or check out some of his books, you can check out his website, his Facebook page, Twitter feed, and get personally autographed copies from the Changing Hands Bookstore.

Our next scheduled interview is March 31st with author and dear friend Angela Misri, who will be talking about her debut novel Jewel of the Thames. So get excited for that!

WordPress Tag!

Posted: March 3, 2014 in Living and Life, Writing
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I’m tagged! And yes, that’s a good thing. author Lorna Dounaeva just tagged me in a game of WordPress tag, which means I answer some questions and then I tag at least three other writers to answer the same set of questions. So excited! So let’s get started:

What are you currently working on?

At the moment, I’m just working on a bunch of short stories, though I plan by at least the fifteenth to get back to my WIP Laura Horn. I’m also working on getting my novel Snake published on June 10th (assuming the copyright office doesn’t screw with me in any way, shape or form. As a government office, they’re likely to do so, I’m afraid). I’m also trying to publish some short stories, so we’ll see what magazines accept them. Fingers crossed and hoping for the best.

How does your work differ from other authors in the genre?

Well, that’s really kind of a loaded question. Every author is different in terms of style and content, no matter what genre. However if I have to say, it’s that I try to make crazy concepts seem believable. At least, in theory I do. Ask my critics on how I’m doing in that department.

Why do you write what you do?

I’ve always loved scaring people, ever since a somewhat traumatic event in my past. And I love writing, so it’s fun to combine the two together.

How does your writing process work?

I work best in my room on the bed, so I try to write there mostly. When I work on novels, I usually write an outline of what happens in the story, and then set about writing the story out. It’s a torturous process, especially in the beginning. Tackling a whole novel gets easier as the story moves forward, but at the beginning it’s almost like rolling a boulder up a very big hill. Eventually I finish the story, and after several edits and feedback from a beta reader or two, I try to publish it. For short stories, the process is similar, except without the outline phase.

And now I tag three writers:

Matthew Williams, author of the recently released Papa Zulu.

Raymond Esposito, author of You and Me Against the World.

Pat Bertram, author of Grief: The Great Yearning.

Dear Alice: Finished

Posted: March 2, 2014 in Living and Life, short story, Writing
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It’s rare that I begin a short story and that I finish it within a day. It’s even rarer when I finish it a few hours after starting it. But that’s what happened tonight. And my God, was it amazing.

You remember in my last post I said I was trying to rewrite the science-fiction story I’d started on Sunday. Well, I’m still trying to figure out where it should go from here and how to make it exciting. So while I’m working on that little problem, I decided to devote my time to a different short story. What resulted was Dear Alice, a story of a woman in England who writes letters to her childhood friend (Alice, obviously) about how as children they were kidnapped by a farmer who used them as slave labor. It’s a very interesting story, and I rather liked how it turned out, especially the twists near the middle-end portion of it.

The whole story is about 3,600 words (give or take a few), and I somehow wrote it in only a couple of hours. That’s a personal record for short story writing. It also shows what happens when I really get into a story and I eschew most distractions that I can really amaze myself. I think I’ll send this to a friend or family member within the next couple of weeks to get some feedback on it. I seriously hope that they like it, and that they can offer some good suggestions on it.

In the meantime though, I’m going to head to bed and get some rest. Tomorrow may be Sunday, but that doesn’t mean I get to rest (being Jewish, Saturday is the day I rest, and sometimes not even then). I may even start another short story if I’m unable to figure out what to do with my short-story-in-progress by then. Wish me luck.

Goodnight, my Followers of Fear. Or good morning, depending on what time you’re reading this. I’m sure some people are a few time zones behind me, some are just having their morning coffee while they read this, and maybe one or two are insomniacs or staying up late. If I think about this more than I have, it’s going to get weird. Anyway, goodnight (because it is for me at this point).

Once Again, A Rewrite

Posted: February 27, 2014 in ideas, Living and Life, Progress Report, short story, Writing
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I started a short story this past Sunday, a science-fiction story with LGBT characters and themes about how complicated relationships can get. It had a great concept, and it was an exciting story. I’ve been looking forward to writing it ever since I had the idea for it, and I made sure it was on the list of short stories I was going to work on when I decided it was time to limit how many more I was going to write. And I was making great progress on it too. I mean really good progress. Except for Tuesday night (I was busy that night with other stuff) I was getting 500-1000 words written each night.

But as I got further in this evening, I realized that I was slowing down, that something wasn’t working. I realized that the way I was going I was going to hit a wall with this story, so I had to stop and figure out what exactly was bugging me about this story. And I realized: like Resurrection, the way this story was going it’d be better off as a novel or a novella.

Normally I’d be okay with that, but for many reasons I don’t want to convert this particular short story into a novel. Not only do I already have so many ideas for novels to write that I’m not sure I want to add this story to that list, but I feel that if I can find some way to keep the short story as a short story, it’ll be a thousand times better than any novel I could ever write based on it. It’s a very strong feeling, too. So I’m not going to turn this particular story into a novel.

Instead, I’ll go back to the beginning. Most likely I’ll end up rewriting this story, and instead of writing a whole bunch of expository lead-up to the main scene, I’ll write that main scene, which is what inspired and excited me about this story in the first place. I feel overall it’ll be a better story that way, one that a sci-fi magazine would be proud to host within its pages.

So tonight I’ll end my writing spree by saving the short story and taking a break to think about how I can improve it. I have some ideas now, but nothing I want to act on just yet. I just need a little time to let the ideas cook and see what works and what doesn’t work. After all, this is one amazing short story idea I have. And it deserves to be written in a way I can be proud of.

That’s all for now. I’m going to watch something I’ve taped, and see what my brain can come up with in the morning. You all have a lovely night, and a fantastic weekend, my Followers of Fear. And I hope wherever you are, you’re warmer than I am. It’s Arctic temps here in Ohio. Trust me, I’m looking forward to spring and summer a lot more than most. Good thing I’ve got my Snuggie to keep me warm.

Spring Semester 2014: Half-Time Report

Posted: February 26, 2014 in Living and Life
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O-H!

It’s Week 8 of the semester, which means it’s time for me to check in and let you all know how I’m doing this semester at Ohio State. And I’m very happy to say, I’m doing extremely well. My classes are all going well, I’m on track for my study abroad trip, I may have a thesis advisor for next year, and work is going very well. Things are great!

First, starting with classes. As I said at the beginning of the semester, I’m taking five courses, four of which are related to my study-abroad trip. Those four courses are a course in American history centering around the period between 1921-1963, a class to learn some basic French, a seminar specializing in World War II-related topics, and a class on French-American relations through the years. I’ve been getting good grades in all of those classes, though the French language class has a lot of words I sometimes have trouble remembering (go figure, and I’m still better at German), and the research seminar requires a lot of reading. Normally that wouldn’t be a problem, but I need five primary sources and at least five secondary sources for my final paper, which is to be about the Nazi obsession on the occult. I have three secondary and one primary so far. Oy vey.

As for the fifth class, I’m taking a class on Deaf Literature. I thought that would be the class that would be difficult for me (there’s always at least one), but it’s been a delight. The teacher is someone I’ve had before (though she was a TA then), and she even bought a copy of The Quiet Game, definitely a plus. I also got the chance to write a short story for class, which I blogged about in a previous post, and I’ve been really enjoying the material. Heck, I’m learning so much more about Deaf culture than I thought possible. It’s pretty mind-blowing.

As for the study abroad trip, it’s coming along great. I’ve received the itinerary, and this weekend (if I have the chance) I’ll stop by my cellular company’s local store to see whether if it’s better to bring my phone abroad or get a prepaid. It’ll probably be the latter, from the advice I’ve been hearing. Now if only I can win some scholarships, I’ll be in heaven.

For the thesis, I’ve got a novel I want to write, one that’s pure horror and that’s got some great potential. I just need someone to advise me. I’ve got two teachers who may be able to help me. One of them is a teacher I’ve taken a class with before who may be willing to be my advisor, provided he can find the time in his schedule. The other is a teacher whose class I might be taking in the fall (provided she likes the pieces I sent her). She seemed open to working with me, so hopefully she’ll be willing to work with me.

And finally, for work I got my first raise. It’s not much, about twenty-five cents more per hour, but it’ll help a little with expenses. And I hope in the future I’ll be able to get some more raises in the future.

Well, that’s all for now. I’ll be doing another semester update after I get my final grades back. And now if you’ll need me, I’ll be working on a short story. Goodnight, Followers of Fear.

500 Followers!!!

Posted: February 24, 2014 in Living and Life, Progress Report
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It’s happened! One of those milestones that every blogger waits and hopes for. I have just gotten my five-hundredth follower, making me feel like I’m on top of the world.

I’d like to thank everybody who’s been signing on to follow in the past couple of weeks, including dyslexiasuccesscoach, biggirlbigpanties, nandaputrari2014, and other bloggers. I’d also like to thank longtime followers and friends for all the support and love you’ve been giving me for over two-and-a-half years, including Angela Misri of a Portia Adams adventure, Matt Williams of Stories by Williams, and so many others. It means a lot to me that you’d listen to the thoughts and struggles of a college student trying to become a great horror writer. And when somebody from the blog buys one of my books, boy does it make my day.

That reminds me, I want to get to know my followers a bit more. I can’t follow everyone who follows me, so I’d like to know a bit more about you, the reader. Who are you? What do you blog about? Why do you follow my blog? Please let me know. I’m always happy to hear from people who are reading my work.

Well, that’s all for now. I’ve got work and classes in the morning, so I’m going to get ready for bed. You have a good night, my Followers of Fear. And I hope you’re having warmer temperatures than I am at this moment. Central Ohio is supposed to have temperatures that are below freezing during the next week or two. It’s too scary for even me to write in detail at the moment!

Darkness at Noon: Finished

Posted: February 23, 2014 in Living and Life, short story, Writing
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Great book if you’re interested in the Dust Bowl of the 1930s.

You know you’re a writer and a college student when you manage to find ways to make your writing count for a grade. And that was kind of the point of this latest short story, which I wrote for one of my classes. Called Darkness at Noon, it’s not a horror story despite the title. Instead, it’s more literary/historical fiction. Why the heck am I writing that sort of story? I’ll explain.

The class I wrote this story for is my Deaf Literature and Culture class. Our teacher gave us an assignment to bring in some artifact (a book, a painting, a TV show or movie), something that represented deaf culture and do a presentation on it. I chose to write a short story, partially because I didn’t want to repeat myself by bringing up the episode of House where he treats a deaf teenager (I’d used this for a previous assignment), but mostly because I seriously wanted to write a short story and get something from it, such as a good grade. After getting the okay from my teacher, I started on the short story immediately.

As with most writing, getting started and keeping it going can be difficult. The style of story was also difficult for me, as I prefer horror and with no serial killer, ghost, or even angry wild animal, it was sometimes slow going writing this one. However this evening, after getting home from watching a movie with some members of my study abroad group and taking a shower, I set down to finish the story. I’m happy to report that I finished it at 4,652 words, at about a quarter to two in the morning.

The story itself follows a young woman living in the Dust Bowl during the 1930s who is deaf. She’s unhappy with the direction her life has taken, and it takes a terrible dust storm to make her realize that things aren’t as bad as she thinks.

I got most of my research from what I’ve been learning in my Deaf Lit class, as well as from the book The Worst Hard Time by Tim Egan, which I finished last weekend for another class. Both helped me visualize not only the world my character lived in, but also taught me what might go through the mind of a young woman who has to live in a town where she’s the only one who can’t hear. I like to think my character has a lot of baggage to her. She feels alone and isolated because of her deafness, and has some understandable anger towards those who’ve looked down on her because of the fact that she’s deaf.

Anyway, I like how this story turned out for the most part. I think the ending will need a little tweaking to make for a smooth finish, but I feel confident that when I turn it in on March 21st, I’ll get a very good grade for it (and possibly a recommendation for some Deaf Lit magazines or somewhere else I could publish the story).

Well, that’s all for now. I’m probably going to go to bed soon, so I’d like to wish you all good night and hope you have pleasant dreams. See you tomorrow, my Followers of Fear.

Why I Lost Two Facebook Friends Last Night

Posted: February 20, 2014 in Living and Life, Reflections, Social Activism
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I do not tolerate negative language meant to denigrate a person because of their race, gender, orientation, or ability. So when I see someone using this sort of language flippantly or carelessly, I usually tend to avoid that person. If they’re a friend though, I’ll try to convince them not to use that language before I cut them off.

Last night I was forced to do just that. Someone I’m acquainted with at school was responding to people lamenting about Facebook buying some app or another. He thought it was hypocritical that they were complaining about it on Facebook and said they should reevaluate their lives (though he didn’t phrase it in such nice terms). Where I got upset was when he used the word “retard”. I’ve mentioned before that I have an autism spectrum disorder and I’d been called “retard” or “retarded” more than once by bullies because I didn’t understand certain social boundaries or conventions when I was younger. Not to mention that mental retardation (or intellectual disabilities, which seems to be the preferred term among medical professionals these days) is an actual medical condition, so using it as an insult hurts the people with actual mental retardation worse than it hurts the people having the insult hurled at them.

I asked my friend if he would not use that word because it has the potential to hurt people. He responded that he was using the word without negative connotations and that people should realize that (as if we’re mind-readers!). He also said he uses racial and other denigrating terms, including the N-word, and said he uses them without the negative connotations and that it’s my problem if I was insulted by it.

At that moment another friend of his, whom I’m acquainted with as well, joined the thread and started using the very same terms we’d just been discussing. At that point I decided to leave the conversation, unfriend the both of them, and go to bed (though not before coming up with an idea for a short story based on this experience). And it’s still on my mind, as this blog post makes evident.

The thing is, even if they think they’re not using the words with their negative connotations, it’s not so easy to disassociate a word or symbol from its negative meanings. Otherwise the swastika would still mean good luck and auspiciousness rather than Nazi Germany and the Holocaust as it does for many Westerners. And these sort of microaggressions can have terrible effects on the people being denigrated. If you’ve never heard the term “microaggression” before, there’s a great blog post on microaggressions that explains them in depth. If you don’t have the time to read it though, a microaggression is basically the everyday little forms of discrimination that minorities experience throughout their lives. An example is the continued use of saying “that’s so gay” as a way of saying something’s stupid. It is not only bringing down whatever is being called gay, but it is saying that there is something wrong with being gay in the first place. And while the basic definition of microaggressions means they are small, especially when compared to gay-bashings or other forms of assault and more obvious forms of discrimination, over time they can build up and cause stress, depression, or suicidal thoughts in the person being denigrated.

Personally I only ever use these sort of terms in stories in order to portray a character the way I want him or her to come across to an audience. Even then I hesitate to do it and seriously consider whether I should really use such negative terms and if there is another way to get across the full impression of the character. That’s why within all of Reborn City, a novel about gangs divided mostly on racial lines and with a white supremacist gang, you’ll only see one instance where I use the N-word and other racial terms (though I do have several characters call Zahara a “terrorist” in order to illustrate how ignorant and prejudiced the world of RC is against Muslims).

So when I see people using these sort of terms so flippantly, uncaring about the negative consequences of these words, I get pretty upset. These terms are attacks on people because they’re minorities, and because my former friends are white or deeply tanned and don’t receive discrimination for their skin color, gender, sexual orientation, or level of ability, they don’t necessarily realize the damage they’re doing by using these terms. And by calling the rest of us oversensitive for being upset that they’re using these words, they’re proving that they’re insensitive to the problems of others, not that we’re oversensitive.

So I finish this post urging people to really think about the terms they use. You’re not being cool or rebellious by using terms that bring down minorities. What you’re doing is hurting people and causing people to think you’re ignorant or bigoted. If you’re going to use them, use them in a way that won’t hurt anyone, such as using the N-word in Huckleberry Finn is used to illustrate the beliefs of that age towards African-Americans. Or these words can be used to fight discrimination: there is a growing body of literature, music and other media that uses these words to show how hurtful they are and possibly change the way people think. Slowly but surely, some people are changing the way that they think.

That is all for now. I hope my former friends learn that using these words has negative consequences. Especially the guy who actually happens to own an up-and-coming business. How many businesses have failed because of something the owner has done? I hope that doesn’t happen to him someday.

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