Posts Tagged ‘editing’

So I’m sure many of you are wondering what it’s like to work for the US Army in Europe. Well, I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you.

Okay, how many of you laughed at that, and how many of you took that seriously?

In reality, I can go into a bit of what I’ve been doing here, as long as I don’t give away anything that could even remotely threaten national security (and that doesn’t give any information to stalkers. Yeah, you know who you are. I know you’re out there. Especially you!). So without further ado, here’s what I’ve been doing in the office lately.

So, if you haven’t heard lately, I’ve been working in the Equal Employment Opportunity office at the base in Wiesbaden, which is actually central command for US Army Europe. And guess what else? My office is the top EEO office for all of Europe. I’m not kidding, if the general needs advice on EEO stuff, he goes to the head of the office, Ms. Moya, to discuss policy (apparently she’s written the book on EEO in the Army, and is a major reason why I can even work in the Army when technically I have a disability). Besides Ms. Moya, there’s Mr. Vitiello, who is my direct supervisor and is considered one of the top EEO specialists on the continent, and there’s me. The new guy learning the ropes and contributing any way I can. It’s a small but extremely important office, and we’re busy each and every day.

And speaking of offices, I have one of my own. Yeah, I do. At the moment we’re moving some things around the larger EEO office, so mine’s become the designated storage space for all our supplies till we’re done with the moving. But yeah, for the next two-and-a-half months (perhaps longer, we’ll see) it’s my office. And I’m pretty psyched about it. I got my own key and a computer with two monitors and a nice view out one of the windows. It’s not too bad.

As for what I’ve been doing…well, I’ve been doing a lot of reading on diversity. There’s not a lot of coursework that can be taken in that subject. Well, maybe there is. It’s kind of an HR job in a way, so maybe go to business school with a focus on HR and…I’m getting off track. Anyway, it’s a big topic to talk about, especially in regards to the Army, so I’ve got a lot of reading to do. I’m happy to do it, of course. It’s not horror novels, but it’s interesting and informative, so there’s a plus.

I’ve also been writing, specifically I’ve been writing an article on the benefits of diversity in the Army that will appear in a newsletter that will be read all over Europe. I did a lot of research for the article, and now it’s going through editing phases. I’ve also been filling paperwork out and taking online courses for work (when the Internet is actually working for me. We’ve had problems with that. “If it’s not one thing, it’s another” has become a common refrain for me lately).  And in off moments, when there’s nothing to do, I find time to write, which can be scarce during these busy days.

As for the rest of the base…that’s classified. I can say that the buildings and layout are not what I expected. At times it reminds me of a camp I once visited as a teenager, where nothing seemed to be near anything else, and at other times it seems like a small community in a desert town in Arizona or the Mojave (and there’s the writer in me). When I head outside, it’s often warm and sunny, which means I sometimes sweat off my sunscreen (and that’s why I put it on three times a day). But it’s a nice place to work, and I’m figuring out where everything is slowly but surely.

Me at the office.

Me at the office.

Well, that’s all to mention right now. I’m sure as I get through the paperwork and as the Internet gets fixed and all that other stuff, I’ll get into some sort of routine and learn quite a bit more on the subject. And if I stay longer…who knows? Maybe I’ll even get my driver’s license! We’ll see what happens.

In the meantime, tomorrow I go on a trip to Frankfurt through the USO (and this time I know exactly where we’re meeting), and if I get the chance after I get back, I upload a ton of photos and write a blog post about it. Sunday I’m planning on chilling at home and finishing up this short story I’ve been working on before diving back into editing Video Rage. So wish me luck, everyone. I feel I might need it.

Guten nacht, mein Anhanger der Angst!

A street in my new home.

A street in my new home.

Well, not really my first week. It’s been only four or five days since I arrived. But it’s Friday, and tomorrow I’ll be busy with a couple of things, so I might as well write about it now.

So what’s my first week been like? Well…a bit different than what I expected (or what my Tarot predicted, though that was referring to a longer period of time, so maybe the first week shouldn’t have that much reflection on the reading). While I am working and have my own office (and it’s big and cozy too, by the way), I don’t have an ID card yet. As this is a military base with security protocols and whatnot, I need and ID card to do anything significant. Unfortunately, the soonest I can get in to get one is Monday, so until then I’ve been busy with tasks that don’t involve computers or security clearance.

What sort of tasks are those, you ask? Well, I’m supposed to be, among other things, writing articles on behalf of the head Equal Employment Opportunity office of Europe, so in preparation for that I’ve been doing some reading about diversity in the workforce, something EEO feels strongly about. I’m going to be writing an article about implementing diversity to the fullest in such a workforce. In addition to that, I’ve been doing some work with the base’s personal EEO office.

My apartment building.

My apartment building.

Beyond that, I haven’t had that much time to do anything else. I’ve done a little shopping, and gotten to know the neighborhood I live in a little (I live not too far from base in an area full of apartment buildings housing mostly military personnel and/or their families). I’m also getting to know my roommate Ian, whom I have a lot in common with, including religions. And I’ve been adjusting, trying to adapt to living near a base and working on one. I’ve somehow trained myself to go to bed at ten and wake up at five, and be ready to leave the house a quarter to seven for work. How have I done this? I’m not really sure, even a year ago something like that would’ve been impossible for work or school.

Well, thank God it’s the weekend, and that brings it’s own adventures. I’m doing a walking tour of Wiesbaden provided by the USO tomorrow morning, so I’m getting up early (for a Saturday) to go on it. I’m actually pretty excited. I want to see what my new home has to offer. And next week there’s a tour of nearby Frankfurt I’d like to go on as well. We’ll see what happens.

My roommate and I grabbing some drinks.

My roommate and I grabbing some drinks.

The one thing I’m sad about is that I’m unable to continue my German lessons or write lately. The latter particularly upsets me. You know me, as a writer telling stories is my lifeblood. And with a busy life like mine these days, since Monday the most I’ve been able to do is usually very short posts, like the ones on From The Voice Of Common Sense. Hopefully as time goes on though I’ll be able to carve out time to write and edit. I’m trying to get through a new short story and finish editing Video Rage, so the sooner I get those done the better.

In the meantime, I’ve got a big day tomorrow, so I’m going to prep for that. Wish me luck, my Followers of Fear. I think I might need it.

It’s that time again. #FirstLineFriday. Every Friday I post the first one or two lines of a potential story, work-in-progress, or published work. This week’s opening comes from a potential short story I had the idea for yesterday:

Captain Leyla Janx, fifteen years old and feeling her life shortening with every second, ordered her aircraft carrier to turn fifteen degrees to the port side.

Thoughts? Comments? Grammatical errors? Let me know.

That’s all for now. If I get the chance, I’ll write a post about my first week in Germany later  today. Until then, I’m off to work. Einen schonen Tag, my Followers of Fear (please say I wrote that right!).

It’s Friday again, and you know what that means! It’s #FirstLineFriday, where I take the first one or two lines of a potential story, a story-in-progress, or a published story and post them here (and in one of the Facebook groups I belong to). This week’s entry is from a story I started yesterday, and which I’m currently working on:

“Max gots a boyfriend! Max gots a boyfriend!” Danny sang, laughing as he ran.

“Shut up you little twerp!” shouted his elder sister Max, chasing after her brother through the sand.

Ah, sibling rivalry. I remember it well.

Thoughts? Comments? Grammatical or punctuation errors? I know, Danny’s saying “gots”, but he’s four, so I think we can let that one slide.

Have a good weekend and Fourth of July everyone. It’s my last one before I leave for Germany day after tomorrow, so I’m hoping to make it extra special. Wish me luck!

I’m very proud to announce that one of my short stories, “Tigress Lizzy”, is going to be published this October in a very special Halloween anthology. This anthology is going to be published by the same people who published Strange Portals, the anthology I was featured in back in December. I’m very excited that I’m getting published with them again and very grateful that they liked my work so much. I’m looking forward to seeing what they produced this time.

“Tigress Lizzy” can be considered my tribute to Stephen King’s Carrie, which is still one of my favorite works by the author. It’s the story of a teenage girl who’s school life is incredibly difficult, but one day she is offered a gift that allows her to get back at everyone who has hurt her. It’s a dark and bloody work, and like Carrie it shows that when you push someone repeatedly, sometimes you cross a line and release a whole ton of horror.

At this point, the anthology is still being assembled, and it doesn’t have a name or a cover yet. However as my work’s been accepted, I’ll be getting updates regularly and posting them either here on the blog or on my Facebook or Twitter pages. In the meantime, if you’ve got something you think could go into the anthology, you can click here to get the details. They’re accepting submissions till the end of August, so you’ve got some time till then. Good luck!

All for now. I’ve got some writing to do, so I’m going to get to it. Wish me luck, my Followers of Fear!

Authors are constantly evolving. Even late in their careers, they’re never not learning new tricks or trying some experiment with their latest story. Check out Anne Rice’s latest stories, introducing scientific elements into what are normally supernatural stories, or JK Rowling going from fantasy coming-of-age series into literary and crime. Heck, His Royal Highness Stephen King is doing hard-crime and has introduced more alien and sci-fi elements into a lot of his recent stories.

Back in January I wrote a post about how I wanted to create the same images in my stories but with less words. As my word counts are still often very high, measuring whether or not I’m actually succeeding based on that. So while I’ve been editing one of my short stories for an anthology I wanted to get published in, I looked at specific paragraphs, looked at how they were pre-editing, and then what they looked like post-editing. What I got looked pretty promising.

Here’s one paragraph prior to editing:

One of the cheerleaders opened a door and Lizzy was thrown in, falling down a set of stairs. As she landed on hard concrete floor, she heard the girls laughing up above. They thought this was funny? She’d be lucky if she came away from this with just bruised ribs!

And here’s the same paragraph after it’s been edited:

One of the cheerleaders opened a door and Lizzy was thrown in, falling down a set of stairs, landing hard on concrete floor, the other girls laughing up above. They thought this was funny? She’d be lucky if she came away with only bruised ribs!

There’s a five-word difference, two sentences have been merged into one, and I changed “just” for “only” in the last sentence. There’s a more noticeable difference in the second example I have:

Suddenly Eric stood up, turning around in a circle to face the cheerleaders with an angry look on his face. Some of the cheerleaders actually shrank away from him, which Lizzy thought was extraordinary: she’d never thought anything but pimples scared these narcissistic twats.

And the edited version:

Eric stood up, glaring at each and every cheerleader in turn. Some of them actually shrank away from him, which Lizzy thought was extraordinary: she’d thought nothing but pimples actually scared these narcissistic twats.

Ten word difference, and if you ask me it creates the same basic image while being less wordy. In fact, I thin it’s written better than the first example, creating much more compelling images than before. And along with these examples, I’ve noticed a few more differences in how I write. For instance, I’m using less words involving the suffix “ing” (otherwise known as a gerund*). I would often write a sentence like this, “Getting up and heading to the cabinet, Lizzy slid back the secret panel and got out the scotch”. Now I prefer writing “Lizzy got up, went to the cabinet, slid back the secret panel, and got out the scotch.” To me, this seems not necessarily smoother, but it sounds better to me. It’s four succinct actions, one after another. Boom, boom, boom, boom, forming images in your head that run in fluid succession, like a scene on a Blu-Ray disc. Plus one word shorter, that’s not bad.

In any case, I feel like this is real good progress for me. Like I’ve said before, I’ve stopped worrying about word count because that sort of worry makes it difficult for me to tell the story as it needs to be told. But if finding ways to tell the same good story with less words can make for a better story, then yes I will pay attention to word count. And as you know, I’m all about telling a great story, so I’ll keep working on trying to tell a good story with less words, see where it gets me.

Hopefully many more stories, a few more published works and a lot of scared readers. Am I right?

That’s all for now, my Followers of Fear. I’ll see you next time, which I swear will be before I leave Germany. Have a good one!

*Funny story I can’t resist telling you, when I was in high school at Columbus Torah Academy, I was taking an English class and we were going over the different parts of grammar. When we came upon gerunds, I commented that the word sounded British (and they kind of do). My English teacher then, for whatever reason, told me to speak British. So I put on my terrible British accent, and start saying all these British phrases: “Pip pip, cheerio.” “Spot of tea and crumpets.” “God save the Queen.” And then randomly the head of the Judaic Studies department at the time, Rabbi Elbaz, a short Moroccan rabbi with this really thick accent, walks into our classroom. I say, “God save Rabbi Elbaz too.” The class laughs, and then Rabbi Elbaz says, “Oy Rami, now God will look into my records and see all the bad things I’ve done.” I swear, the whole class was laughing hysterically until he left! I wish I knew what he thought of it.

As many of you know, I got a job with the US Army Civilian Corps working in their Equal Employment Opportunity office in Wiesbaden, Germany (about a stone’s throw near Frankfurt, in case you were wondering). I was supposed to leave at the beginning of the month, but there was a miscommunication at some point and I’ve been sorting through paperwork since. But as of today, that’s all over. I’ve got my orders, so I’ll be leaving July 5th from Columbus, arriving in Frankfurt on the 6th, and starting work on the 7th. I’ve already ordered my tickets.

I’m very excited that this is finally happening. I’ll be staying there on base through September, with the possibility of staying longer depending on how circumstances shape out. In addition to working on an Army base in another country, I plan to do as much exploring and learning as much as possible and exploring as much as possible. I’d like to see some museums, go to castles and other historical places, head into the Jewish neighborhoods to pray, get kosher food, and socialize with people sharing my heritage, and trying good ol’ fashioned German food and drink (provided it’s kosher or vegetarian, of course). And of course I’m looking forward to getting all sorts of inspiration for my stories. When I was in Europe last year I had 40 ideas for stories and articles in a period of three weeks. Imagine what three months will lead to!

Of course, I’ve got a lot of prep to do. I leave in six days, so I have to pack, practice my German (which is coming along great, thanks to the program I’m using and the phrasebook I’ve been writing), ask my supervisor a thousand questions so I get there prepared, reroute my mail to my new address once I get it (I’ll be living on the base), and a hundred other things. Plus I’ll be writing or editing when I have time, I can’t give that up. No really, I can’t give that up: I actually get stressed out if I’m unable to write or edit or blog or publish. And nobody needs unnecessary stress. Am I right?

So wish me luck and a safe trip (in German: Ich wunsche dir eine gute Reise!) as I start the next chapter in my life. Until next time, my Followers of Fear! Auf Weidersehen!

 

Bit late in the day, but it’s Friday, so it’s #FirstLineFriday! On this day, I post the first or first two lines of a published work, work-in-progress, or potential story. Today’s selection comes from my first published novel, Reborn City. I hope you like it.

Zahara and her family had decided to eat out at a restaurant in North Reborn that served kosher meat, the closest they could get to halāl.

Thoughts? Comments? Grammatical problems? Let me know. Have a good weekend!

 

I’m getting very naughty. First I’m swearing in Facebook posts, now I’m swearing in the titles of my blog posts.

Recently I had my five-hundredth idea for a short story or novelette since I started keeping a list. It was actually last night as I was getting ready for bed. I was thinking of an SVU rerun I’d watched earlier in the day and I thought of a minor character in the episode and what might’ve happened if he’d done some things differently in that episode. That birthed an idea (ah, Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. One of these days I will do a post about how you’ve gotten in my head and given me so many ideas for stories). Anyway, it occurred to me that this would be my five-hundredth idea. And then I asked myself how many I’d actually at least gotten a first draft of. And today I counted.

The total count: 17. Yeah, only 17 out of 500 have at least made it past the first draft (what state they are afterwards varies). This was about the amount I expected, though I’m not happy about how little I’ve written. When I was thinking about this last night, I thought to myself, Time’s a quick bastard. It moves by so fast, and between school, the hurdles of getting a job, practicing German, the Netflix binges I keep getting myself drawn into, and everything else going on, you can’t keep up. Too bad. Some of these story ideas are really awesome.

That’s the sad part about being the author. You want to be able to write all the time, to not have to sleep or eat and the only distractions are ones you want to get distracted by and that don’t take up a lot of time. Sadly, reality is not always so pleasant, and we’ve got to deal with it how we can. As much as I would like to write more, as much as I would like to get a few more items on that list crossed off, I know that I don’t always have the time for it.

And I would like more time, definitely. I would. And maybe someday I will have more time. I know friends who’ve gotten publishing contracts or have gotten enough sales through self-publishing and they find more time to write and edit and publish and market. True, this often comes after many years of writing, when they’ve had careers, built up portfolios, had other stuff work for them. It’s something involving luck, ambition, hard work, dedication, and of course time.

Funny, time’s like money. You have to spend it to make it. Time’s not just a quick bastard, time’s a hard one to work with. And of course sometimes you don’t get the time you look for. Or you do but there’s family concerns or people want you to devote your time to other stuff because suddenly you have more of it. It’s a tough life to live, knowing that the time doesn’t always work with you in your writing career.

Still, I’m not letting time–what time I have–get away from me. After so much time, Video Rage is finally getting edited. I’ watched a documentary tonight over dinner that’ll help me with a story I’ve been struggling with for over a year. I’ve even figured out what short stories I might work on after I’ve finished with Video Rage, and what I’ll do after those are done. What little time I have, I’ll make work for me until I have more.

Time’s a quick and tricky bastard to work with. But I’m not going to let time get the best of me. Eventually, I’ll get time to work for me, so I’ll be the most prolific author I can be.

Until then, I keep doing what I’ve done since I first started my goal of writing to become published: just one word at a time, until the story comes together.

Last night as I was dropping off to sleep and feeling happy about setting up that new blog of mine (thanks to everyone who’s already signed up to follow that, by the way), my mind started to wander, as it usually does right before I fall asleep. This time around my mind went to horror stories (yeah, it does that quite often too), and I started to ponder character depth and development in horror stories. At some point I realized that in horror, you often have either characters who are very well-rounded and developed, or you have characters that are little more than archetypes, e.g. the Skeptical Dad, the Final Girl, The Psychic Child, The Expert, etc. And you know what else I realized, what made me get up out of bed and write this revelation down before I fell asleep and forgot? Sometimes these stories require different level of character development, depending on what the story is.

Let me explain. In certain scary stories, such as Stephen King’s The Shining (the book, not that poorly adapted Kubrick film), the characters are more than just archetypes and we get to know them very well. This is because their inner conflicts are just as important to the story as is the outer conflicts happening with the hotel. Jack Torrance is trying to keep his cool and be a good husband and father for his family after so many screw ups, while also fending off his desire to drink and the mental assaults of the hotel. His wife Wendy is trying to keep her family together while also keeping an eye on Jack in case he reverts to bad habits. And Danny, psychic and wise beyond his years, is trying to stay strong and endure the hotel’s attempts to kill him because he knows a lot is riding on his father taking care of the hotel through the winter. How they react to situations and grow as characters is just as important as what is happening within the hotel, so King makes sure they are well-developed.

Part of the terror (in the book, anyway), comes from the conflicts these characters wrestle with inside themselves as well as the ones the hotel sends them.

Meanwhile other stories don’t need as much character development. Take Insidious 3, for example (yes, I’m using the third entry in a horror film series, but bear with me). Besides main character Elise Rainier, most of the characters in the film do not get much character development. In the Brenner family, who are experiencing all these supernatural happenings, you don’t see much beyond the roles they play in the story: Quinn is a pretty girl with dreams of acting and is being victimized by a spirit, her dad Sean is the scatter-brained parent trying to keep his family together through grief and tragedy, and the annoying younger brother Alex is…well, the annoying younger brother. Despite not getting a lot of characterization though, these three characters do actually get some growth in the story: Quinn’s car accident and the spirit attacking her causes her, her brother, and her father to get out of their own little worlds and come together as a family to save Quinn’s life.

And of course, there are those stories that require little or no characterization or growth at all. This is common in slasher films, where the characters are often reduced to archetypes or roles (anyone who’s seen Cabin in the Woods knows what I’m talking about). This also happens in a short story I had an idea for recently (and that I might write as soon as I finish editing Video Rage). In this story, I decided that I wouldn’t spend time going over why the protagonist’s younger brother is a bratty kid or why the antagonists are as freaky as they are. The reason I decided this is because the events of the story are where the terror and intrigue come from, not from any inner growth. This is usually the case with slasher films as well: the events of the story are where we get our terror and excitement from, so more attention is pointed towards telling the story than going over any inner conflicts of the characters.

Half the fun of this show is seeing these two interact with each other.

What I’m driving at here is that how much character development is required from a story depends a lot on where the excitement and fear is coming from and how essential developing a character is in order to keep a reader or viewer invested in the story. In the case of a Nightmare on Elm Street film or the story I mentioned above, we’re reading or seeing the story because we know that the story’s events is where we’re going to get the excitement we paid to read/see. In the case of stories like The Shining or most episodes of Hannibal though, a major reason why we’re investing time into the story is because of the characters, not just what’s happening around them. This is especially so in Hannibal, because most of the conflicts and intrigue comes from the characters, their psychological states, and how they play against one another. We’re there not just because Hannibal Lecter is a famous and charismatic serial killer, we’re also there because we like seeing how Will Graham’s relationship with Lecter changes and evolves over time.

And knowing how much to balance of these two elements–character development and story-focus–is very important. Look at the remake of Poltergeist that came out recently. It was an awful film, and one of the many problems it had was that they tried to insert character development near the beginning of the film and failed miserably. Early on it focused on the dad losing his job and trying to find a new one, as well as mentioned something about the wife being a writer. I think the filmmakers were trying to translate this into an arc where the family tries to stay together and come together through rough circumstances, but ultimately the whole thread of the dad looking for a job and the parents trying to keep the family together fails to really get resolved or come together and ends up feeling unnecessary to the story. You’d think that it would just be enough to say the dad got promoted or transferred or a new job and leave it at that!

So whether it’s a zombie flick, a novel about a haunted house, or a psychological horror TV show, knowing the balance between character development and story-focus is just as important as creating a memorable and creepy villain or writing the story in such a way so that the story actually remains scary rather than goofy or just plain stupid (*cough* Friday the 13th remake *cough*). If you do, you’re more likely to write a good story worth remembering than you are to write garbage that horror fans sift through trying to find a nugget of gold.

I’ll certainly keep the balance in mind with the next story I write.