Posts Tagged ‘comedy’

Hollywood and the Coming Saturation

Posted: March 15, 2015 in Living and Life, Reflections
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saturation [n]: the act or result of supplying so much of something that no more is wanted.

–courtesy of Merriam Webster Online

Lately Hollywood is all about the franchises. Disney announced recently that they are making a Frozen 2, that they’ve set release dates for a Star Wars spin-off and Episode VIII, and for some reason they’re doing a live-action Dumbo remake. Sony recently announced that alongside the new female-led Ghostbusters reboot they’re making a male led one as well to even things out (because three male-led films vs. one female-led one is true equality), plus a production company to come up with all sorts of Ghostbusters-related stuff, and a Zoolander 2 is on its way as well.

Look, I’m looking forward to some of these sequels and prequels and remakes and reboots and spin-offs and franchises. Try and keep me away from the Poltergeist remake, the new Star Wars episode, and a few other upcoming films. However, I think that all this emphasis on creating major film series and franchises is actually working against Hollywood rather than helping it. I know that place is run by money primarily, with the idea of making memories and memorable films being a far second, and all these mega-franchises has everyone wanting to have their own moneymaker. But to pursue all that without investing in new material, to me anyway, is not smart business practice.

Not that there haven’t been original films this year. Seventh Son, Jupiter Ascending, and Chappie all are original films (one’s based on a novel, but whatever), so studios aren’t totally ignoring original ideas. However, the former two were panned and didn’t do well at the box office, while the latter…well, it did well at the box office, but the critics don’t seem to like it. I didn’t either. And that isn’t good, because it might make movie studios more wary about greenlighting new projects.

Does this seem a little excessive to you?

This means more superhero movies, more film series and franchise, more reboots and remakes and God only knows what else. And that’s likely to continue. The question is, how long will it continue? Marvel and DC have films scheduled through 2019 and 2020 respectively, but will we feel like watching them by that time? Will we feel like we’ve seen these films so many times that it takes something rare to make us enjoy the film, like it is for so many horror fans today? Are we going to reach saturation point soon? And when it does, what will the film industry do?

Luckily, there’s the indie scene, which is producing original and wonderful stories all the time (particularly horror: I Am A Ghost, The Babadook, and the upcoming It Follows, though I haven’t seen that last one yet). And the comedy genre keeps churning out with originals, probably because they know that pulling off sequels are difficult in that genre. There’s a growing number of biopics coming out each year (not exactly original, but not exactly overly done either), and most of the movies nominated for the Oscars each year are meant to be stand-alone films. Maybe we won’t reach saturation too soon.

But if we do, I think we might have enough filmmakers out there who aren’t so concerned with money and sequels, and want just to tell good stories. Heck, I might even join in then: I’ve got a few idea for screenplays, so I might write one too one of these days. We’ll see.

Do you like the way Hollywood is these days? Why or why not?

Do you think we’ll reach saturation point soon? What’ll happen when we do?

Review: The Interview

Posted: December 24, 2014 in Living and Life, Review
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First off, I just want to tell the Guardians of Peace and North Korea, there’s no need to hack our computers or our residence! My roommate and I were just drawn by the publicity of this movie! We are not a threat to North Korea! I repeat, we are not a threat to North Korea! The only thing we’re a threat to is the local alcohol population! Plus my roommate kicks ass in Destiny and I kill off fictional people at the drop of a hat, but that’s it!

That said, my roommate Morgan thinks the whole cyber attack and cancellation of this movie was a publicity stunt! How absurd! It’s not an Oscar winner, but it’s a decent movie. Why would Sony fake a cyber attack and then cancel a movie about the North Korean dictator and his highly repressive and cruel yet overly sensitive government in order to drum up press and get more people interested–oh my God!

Well, with the subject material, the buzz around this movie, the apparent drama with the terrorists and  how could we not see it? And when we found out the movie was available through YouTube, we decided to download it. We hooked up my computer to the TV, rented out The Interview, and sat down to watch it.

Me about to watch "The Interview." Totally awesome!

Me about to watch “The Interview.” Totally awesome!

Let me tell you, we had a ton of fun with this movie. Even me, and I prefer horror. James Franco and Seth Rogen are hilarious as a nutso man-child and his straight-man babysitter who possibly are closer than best friends (hint hint, wink wink). And every other major actor in this film, including Randall Park as Kim Jong-un and Diana Bang as Sook, play their roles with such convincing ease that it’s hard to believe that it’s just acting The only reason I don’t really believe that Randall Park is not Kim Jong-un is because there are some slight facial differences.

In any case, the humor is everywhere in this movie. From the WTF Lord of the Rings references to the somewhat disgusting body humor and especially Franco’s obviously-in-need-of-medication Dave Skylark, this film was a blast of hilarity and a good six dollars spent.

One of my criticisms is that they could’ve pushed the boundaries a bit more. Not just with the humor, but also with showing how evil North Korea is. Without spoilers, I felt that how they showed North Korea being evil wasn’t far enough. I know everyone is aware of North Korea’s evil, and it’s difficult to make fun of famines and about impossible with a concentration camp, but still, more could’ve been done.

So all in all, I’m giving The Interview a 4.0 out of 5. It’s a great film, I hope more people watch it, I hope I don’t get hacked, and I’m glad I got to watch it. Happy Holidays and good night, my Followers of Fear.

Fun Halloween Videos

Posted: October 31, 2014 in Living and Life, Scary Stuff
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Good morning, my Followers of Fear. It’s Halloween, the day of the year when my powers are at their greatest, and I am at my most terrifying. In fact, I woke up this morning and I wasn’t me. I looked like…well, if you scroll down below you’ll see what I woke up as.

In the meantime, I thought I’d share some videos with you guys in honor of the holiday. Nothing too scary, I promise you, just some fun Halloween-themed videos like the title of this post promises. Unless of course you’re very easily scared, in which case I can’t guarantee how you’ll react, but I hope it’s a hilarious reaction and someone films you when it happens.

Our first video has been on the blog before. It’s a great video, it’s got wonderful rhythm and rhymes, and it’s got two very influential writers featured in it. It’s Stephen King vs. Edgar Allen Poe in their Epic Rap Battles of History video! It’s the only one of ERB’s videos I have on my iPod as well. You can see why I have it on this list.

Our second video is something I discovered this past summer. Jack’s Halloween Treats is a lite version of the movie Trick ‘r Treat. Of course, because it’s YouTube there’s nothing too terrible, and it’s even got a moral theme. Also, I like this artist’s work (she even did a very interesting take on Frozen‘s “Let it Go” not too long ago) and the video gave me an idea for a Halloween-themed novel that I hope to write someday soon.


Up next on the menu is independent artist and YouTube star Alex Boye. I love this guy, he does some very interesting stuff, like taking traditional songs and remixing them with an African beat. As far as I know though, this song is his original work, and it’s for a very good cause. I hope you like the song and the video. I certainly did.

Number four is a recent upload to the YouTube scene. Lady Killers is a take on how sexy versions of our favorite monsters may not actually be that sexy, but could just be very terrifying. It’s kind of funny, not really that sexy, and sort of scary too.


Our final video is like our first. No particular reason why, except maybe I like the video, and I thought that it’d be good to end this post with the similar kind of video to the first one. This is not Epic Rap Battles though: it’s Animeme Rap Battles. Check out Slender-Man vs. The Unwanted House Guest.

Well, I hope you enjoyed this post and the videos in it. Whatever you’re doing for Halloween, I hope you have an excellent time and please let me know what you’re going as. Have a spooky good time, my Followers of Fear. RAWR!

How do I look this morning, my dears?

How do I look this morning, my dears?

Oh, and sorry if any ads keep you by about fifteen seconds or so from watching the videos. Can’t control that, as much as I try.

A Fun Halloween Attraction You Can Do At Home

Posted: October 11, 2014 in Living and Life, Scary Stuff
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I think you’ll notice that when I am able to post something new this month, it’s more likely than not because it’s related to Halloween. Why? Because Halloween is awesome! Anyway, I managed to somehow get through critiquing five short stories and a biology assignment, so before I attempt to finish a short story for class, I thought I’d take the time to write 2 or 3 blog posts. God knows I’ve been meaning to for days.

The first of these posts is dedicated to those who are still planning what to do for Halloween. And if you’re planning on giving out candy and have some time and funds on your hands, I would like to recommend you guys do this fun little attraction, which I call the Terror Home Theater. You can set this up outside your house, or if you’re able to, in your own garage. What you do is you create a four-sided structure big enough for a group of people to stand in. You have people line up outside and have them enter five or less at a time through the only door in the structure. Remember, the structure should not allow anyone from the outside to see inside, and they should only be aware of thedoor that everyone is entering and exiting through.

On the inside, you should have your computer and a projector that’s aimed at the far wall. Once people are inside, the computer will play a movie that the projector will show everyone. The movie should be no more than a minute or two, and should have plenty of scary imagery. Think the footage from the video in Ring if you’re looking for an example (see video below if you’re unfamiliar with the movie).

The idea of the Terror Home Theater is that while everyone is focused on the movie, someone wearing a really scary costume will sneak in, either from a hidden side entrance or from behind a curtain. When the group of people have finished the movie, they will most likely turn around, either a little unsettled or wondering why that movie was supposed to be scary. At that point they will notice the person in the scary costume standing behind them, who is hopefully doing their best to scare them. And hopefully they will scream.

This is the Terror Home Theater, and there are lots of ways you can go about creating it and/or customizing it. The way I outline it above is a basic version that I thought would be interesting to do, if only I had the supplies and the time to set it up, as well as a neighborhood that people trick or treat in to do it. If you can, you can set it up in your garage using nothing more than curtains and someone manning the entrance and/or the controls (how you get the movie to play is up to you).

If you get the chance and are able to create one, I hope you will do me the honor of filming it, posting the results on YouTube, and then sending it my way. I would love to see what you pull off.

Would you do the Terror Home Theater if possible?

How would you make it your own?

Rami Ungar The Writer: Three Years of Blogging

Posted: August 2, 2014 in Living and Life, Progress Report
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Before you read anything else, just check out this video below.

Now that you’re either laughing yourself silly or wondering what the hell that was,I want to say something important. Three years ago, in a library down the road from where my mom lived, I decided, after much thought, to go on WordPress on create a blog. I didn’t know what would happen. Heck, I didn’t even really know what I was doing! My whole first post, and the first few that came after it, had lower case titles! I had no idea what the difference was between a page or a post, and I did not have categories for the first few posts. It took me even longer to figure out what tags were and why they were so important.

But I learned. I kept blogging. At some point within the first few weeks, I started gaining followers. Just one or two, but they stuck around. I gained more followers. I blogged more and more regularly, finding excuses to publish posts. I tried not to get discouraged when days or weeks would go by and I’d have only one or two views in that entire period. I made more friends, got several new followers, published three books, started writing for Self-Published Authors Helping Other Authors, went abroad, wrote two more books that need to be edited as soon as possible, began work on a thesis, and survived three years of college. And these days, I average at least nine views a day, which makes me plenty happy (I love knowing people are checking out my work)!

You want to know something? I still have no f**king idea what makes a good blog post. I’m not kidding. Every time I think to myself “People are going to want to read this” , or “This could get Freshly Pressed with the right tags” or even “This probably won’t be one of my more popular posts”, more often than not I get surprised. Just the other day two of my posts got more views than I expected. I was like, “Say what?”

Anyway…

A lot has changed in three years. Not just me, though I’ve definitely grown a bit and maybe have gotten some nicer glasses. Basically I’ve grown a nice following. At the time I’m writing this, I’ve got 24.459 views, 1,922 comments, at least 1500-1800 likes (they stopped notifying me of likes after I passed 1337, but I guess-timate it’s around the range I quoted), and 645 followers. I also have 121 followers on my Facebook page and 66 followers on my Twitter feed. I’m very happy that all this has happened (especially the Facebook page and Twitter feed, I’m really surprised that anyone are into those).

So in honor of this great occasion, I’m announcing a week-long sale. From August 2nd to August 9th, all my e-books on Amazon and Smashwords are available for $0.99 to download. So if you’d like to read my books at a discount rate, now is the opportunity to do it. Just type my name into either website, and you’ll find my work. And if you do decide to read any of my books, please let me know what you think once you finish them. A comment or a review, positive or negative, I’d love to know what you think. Just as long as you’re not trolling me or anything. I’d hate that.

And if you see a different price than what I quoted online, check back later. The websites can act funny sometimes.

That’s all for now. I’ve got work to do, so I’m going to do it. Have a great day, my Followers of Fear!

Classic Who and Great Writing

Posted: July 16, 2014 in Living and Life, Reflections, Writing
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Today during my lunch I started watching the Fourth Doctor serial The Sontaran Experiment. Later this week or next I’ll start watching the Fifth Doctor serial Arc of Infinity, and by the end of the summer I’ll probably have watched quite a few more serials. In short, I’ve been bingeing and will continue bingeing on Classic Doctor Who for a while.

Classic Who is pretty interesting. The show lasted for 26 seasons, usually around 20 or so episodes a season, and ran from 1963-1989. They went through seven different leads, at least fifty companions, and a whole host of supporting actors, cameos, writers, directors, producers, and other crew members during that time, becoming one of sci-fi’s biggest staples and was revived twice, once in a TV movie and again in a new TV series whose eighth season (or series, as they call it in the UK) will premiere in a month and a week. This is all quite amazing, considering that Classic Who had a fairly limited budget for special effects.

And I mean fairly limited budget. Like Star Trek in its early years, and occasionally even worse than that. The first couple of years under the Third Doctor, most serials were confined to defending the Earth because of budget cuts preventing the filming of stories taking place in fantastic and strange locales. And even at the best of times, the special effects weren’t that great. Check out this clip from the Third Doctor serial The Three Doctors (also the first serial ever to feature a former Doctor return to the role). Near the end, you’ll see what I mean:

Yeah, that stuff at the end was an anti-matter monster. And apparently it teleported them somewhere. Not exactly high tech, was it? You watch enough classic episodes, you see that they had to make do with not a lot of money, which sometimes made the monsters look very homemade and laughable, or they had to be filmed in certain ways so that the kids at home wouldn’t see an actor’s two feet sticking out of a monster’s butt. Occasionally that even led to criticism of the whole story: the Third Doctor serial Invasion of the Dinosaurs was derided by viewers because the stop motion dinosaurs weren’t very good and seemed to take away from the overall story.

But that just goes to show how amazing the stories the writers told were, both then and now. What they didn’t have in terms of budget, they made up for in telling compelling tales where the Doctor had to fight in order to save the world (or worlds). Stories like the First Doctor serial The Edge of Destruction or the Fourth Doctor serial The Horror of Fang Rock are very suspenseful stories that rely on very little special effects to instead tell very character-driven horror/suspense stories, and the Seventh Doctor serial The Curse of Fenric was actually so terrifying I was a little scared! Not bad for a story whose special effects were mostly make-up and costumes.

Just a glance at that photo is enough to unnerve me!

These old stories contained much more than special effects. They had mystery, pretty funny jokes, history and science, and compelling plots that kept viewers coming back for more and more each episode. Not to mention how these episodes could confront and tackle complex social issues so that even very small children could learn from them. Dalek stories, from the original First Doctor serial The Daleks to modern-day stories are rife with Nazi Germany metaphors, which have been mentioned by various characters over the years. The Green Death dealt with environmental themes by showing what can happen when you let corporations run rampant over natural resources without enough regulation. And American viewers probably squirmed a little when they saw The Power of Kroll and saw in the conflict between the colonists and the Swampies the fight between white Americans and the Native Americans. I’m surprised the Doctor hasn’t been used as a teaching tool for different causes or issues.

And it wasn’t just the stories that drew the viewers in. The characters the writers created were pretty amazing as well. Heck, it was the writers who managed to keep the show going after First Doctor William Hartnell had to leave the show for health reasons and was replaced by Patrick Troughton. In any other show, the main character being replaced by someone who was a completely different character (but still the same person) would’ve ruined the show. It says something about the writers that they could keep the show going after such a change.

And not just the changes in Doctors. The other characters were amazing as well, helping the viewers to connect with the Doctor and see him and the events surrounding him from a human perspective (literally). Yeah, some of them were annoying (Peri Brown got on my nerves), but for the most part they were all a pretty awesome group of characters. Some of my favorites include Jo Grant, played by Katy Manning, who learned much from the Doctor and became quite a heroine in her own right during her time as his assistant. Or Ace, the last companion of the classic series and played by Sophie Aldred, a punk teen from London who nicknamed the Doctor “Professor” and was in many ways his protege. And I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention Sarah Jane Smith, played by Elisabeth Sladen, one of the longest running companions and by far the most popular. She even had her own spin-off show for a few years. God, we Whovians miss her.

Not just the stories, but the characters made this show amazing.

All in all, it’s not surprising that nearly fifty-one years after two teachers followed one of their students home and into a police box that was much bigger on the inside than on the outside, the show is still going on all these years later. Sure, ther have been hiatuses and breaks, but there’s been a fandom big enough that the show has gone on to become one of the most popular and probably the longest running sci-fi franchises in the world. And I believe the writers over the years, especially the writers in the classic series, have played a huge part in that.

Anyway, I’m certainly having fun watching the old Doctor Who serials. I just wish it was easier to get hold of them. Well, that’s all for now. I’ve got the first draft of a novel to finish up, so I’m going to get on that hopefully tonight, but first I need to reverse the polarity of the neutron flow. Wish me luck with that.

4 Horror Films That Can Teach You About The Horror Genre Itself

Posted: July 5, 2014 in Reflections, Review, Scary Stuff, Writing
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This is a post I’ve been wanting to write for a while, but I had to find time (and enough films) to actually settle down and write an article worthy of this subject.

If you’ve seen movies like Scream or Cabin in the Woods, you realize they are not just really good scary movies, but they’re also great commentary on the horror genre itself. Scream was basically saying that, rather than restricting the creativity of film directors, the conventions of horror films, especially slashers, gave them considerable freedom to work with and explore new areas of fear, as well as being a sort of examination of slashers themselves. Cabin in the Woods gave you the impression that horror filmmakers were somewhat like slaves in the entertainment industry, having to abide by certain rules in order to please audiences or be ruined (occasionally that’s true).

These horror films below have their own lessons to teach on the genre, and I’ll try my best to convey them here (and possibly convince you, dear reader, to go and see them for yourself). Whether it’s on unique ways to tell a story, reinventing a familiar story, or even just finding a way to insert some philosophical musings into your movie, these movies all have something to share on the genre.

Urban Legend

The slashers that come after the classics of the eighties and the early nineties come in three categories: really bad sequels, movies that try to copy the classics and fail disastrously, and the ones that go above and beyond, often finding ways to redefine the slasher genre while they do it. Urban Legend is definitely part of the third category, and it shows how the slasher genre can change itself despite some critics’ claims of  “same story, different killer/kids/location/motive”. In this case, a killer begins attacking students and faculty at a remote college campus, but kills them in ways that mirror popular urban legends. Who is the killer, why are they killing like this, and what does all this have to do with one young student and her connection with the original victim? The answers will not only shock you, but it’ll make you appreciate adaptable slashers and those urban legends you all heard as kids and teens in new ways.

Devil

You know how in most horror films the audience knows there’s a supernatural explanation for why freaky stuff is happening and the characters in the film are looking for a rational explanation? In this movie, it’s different: you suspect there’s a supernatural explanation, but at the same time you look for ways it could be rationally explained. In this film based off an M. Night Shyamalan story, five people get stuck in an elevator and are murdered under mysterious circumstances while trapped inside. Who is the killer? Why are they killing? Is it a bizarre murder plot? A psychopath at work? Or maybe, as one security guard believes, it’s a mystical meeting between the damned and the Devil himself. A terrifying film, just watching how the filmmakers portray the unfolding events and make us wonder exactly what is happening is enough to give you some ideas on how to switch up your own stories. Or give you nightmares. That’s always a possibility.

Pulse

Known as Kairo in Japan, this supernatural horror film is as deeply philosophical as it is terrifying. In this movie, spirits manage to find a way into our world through the Internet, and start killing the living, though why they kill the living isn’t always clear. The movie follows several different people, particularly a young woman who is among the first to notice what is happening, and a college student who finds himself delving into the mysterious ghosts with a computer science co-ed he knows. The film besides being scary, offers great insight into our strange, modern world, which can be full of connections and isolating all at once, and why ghosts would want to return to this world in the first place. There’s an American remake of this film, but it loses some of its philosophical/psychological bite in favor of special effects and some more Western horror conventions. It’s not bad, but it’s not as good as the original. Anyway, check out both if you can. They’re both interesting takes on our Internet-obsessed society, if you ask me.

Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon

Our last entry is not even true horror, but horror-comedy and mockumentary. Behind the Mask follows a group of students filming a documentary in a world where famous killers like Jason Voorhees, Freddy Kreuger, and Michael Myers are as real as you or I. The subject of their documentary is a man named Leslie Vernon, a would-be killer who is in training to become a famous killer himself and is preparing for his own night of carnage.  The film switches between documentary-style footage and the more traditional horror-movie footage, breaking down the conventions of the slasher genre as well as their philosophical and Freudian psychological meanings (particularly the role of the “survival girl” motif in these films). Not only is it a great story that examines, pokes fun of, and psychoanalyzes the slasher sub-genre, it also depicts a very doomed romance that is stll rather beautiful and lovely in a weird way. Whether or not you like horror, this is definitely not a film to be missed, because what you can learn from it is great.

Have you seen any of these films? What were your thoughts on them?

What are some great horror films you think can teach people about the genre itself? What is great about them?

The “Joyland” Mix Up

Posted: June 26, 2014 in Living and Life, Novel, Reflections, Writing
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See the difference?

In 2006, author Emily Schultz published her first novel Joyland, about a teenage boy growing up in an Ontario town in 1984. This was her second published book, coming after a 2002 collection of short stories. It apparently got some really great editorial reviews from national publications, calling it a great coming-of-age novel and an exploration into teen sexuality.

About seven years later, His Royal Scariness Stephen King published a novel with the exact same name, about a college student in 1973 who gets a job at an amusement park and finds himself solving an unsolved murder (I’ll have tor find time to read it one of these days). Plenty of King fans went online to download the e-book (some may not have realized that for a while the book wasn’t available in that format, which will explain what happens next). But the funniest thing happened: several of these King fans downloaded Schultz’s book believing it was King’s book. And right until the end, some of them never realized they got a literary coming-of-age by a Canadian-American author instead of a dark, creepy whodunit from Stephen King!

And it reflected in the reviews some of these people gave Schultz’s book. Here’s one who absolutely hated it:

I have always loved Stephen King novels. However, this one was a rambling, stream of consciousness mess. I had to go back and read over the last pages again and again to try to understand what was happening. For a person who reads several books a week, this is annoying, to say the least. I will still read his next book, if there is one. He fascinates me with the way he thinks, generally. This book was not my favorite, by any means.

And here’s one who thought they’d try to counter-balance all the negative reviews from King fans:

However somebody give it a one star rating because THEY accidently purchased it thinking it was Stephen King, i’ve no idea how they did that but this review is too counter balance that one.

Here’s a prankster who thought they’d satire the whole confusion:

As soon as I learned Steven King had his sex change operation AND changed his name, I immediately rushed out and bought this book. The surgery (and hormone therapy) have really changed his appearance AND his writing. It’s amazing. It was almost like reading a completely different author.

Mrs King (Schultz), your new vagina has served you well! Nicely done!

And here’s one from someone who actually thought it was a great Stephen King novel, if you’ll believe it:

Full of suspense and mystery and real, visceral horror. Don’t be put off by the new nom de plume. King’s new pen name signifies another evolution in his career, just as he emerged from the Bachman years’ “Thinner” into the soul-baring masterpiece of “It”. Writing from a feminine perspective is admittedly experimental, but this experiment is a SUCCESS.

Now, I’m sure plenty of authors would be upset about this confusion. Ms.. Schultz has actually kind of taken advantage of the confusion and the money coming her way by creating a Tumblr blog called Spending the Stephen King Money, where she details how she’s been spending her unexpected royalties, from donation to charitable organization to IKEA shopping trips. And of course, it’s only brought more attention to her, and her book. I’m sure plenty of people will read it now just to read the story that got confused with a Stephen King novel.

In fact, there’s a certain author who plans to read the book:

Yep, King is ordering her book, and Ms. Schultz in turn is planning on reading Stephen King’s Joyland. It’s a really weird but hilarious ending to a rather strange series of events stemmingfrom a simple misunderstanding. But hey, I’m sure both authors will laugh about it when they look back on it years from now, if they aren’t laughing about it now. And who knows? Maybe they’ll collaborate torelease books around the same time with the same titles and see what happens. In fact, I kind of hoping they do!

I’m not sure how this sort of thing happens, except through serendipity. In fact, this is the first time I’ve heard of such a thing happening on such a scale that even some media organizations report it. Sure, we all have or know someone who went to get a certain book or movie or check out a certain TV show and ended up reading or watching something with a similar or identical title (that actually happened to me a couple of weeks ago). But on this massive scale? It’s almost a little hard o rap your head around. If Saturday Night Live was airing new episodes right now, this would be the subject of a Weekend Update joke.

Well, like I said above, this is a case of serendipity at work. Just a happy accident. I wish something like that would happen to me, and I’m sure plenty of people will echo the sentiment. Not only is it a funny story, the royalty checks and recognition wouldn’t be too bad either. But it’s still very unlikely, even when your book has a similar name to a bestseller (The Quiet Game and Snake aren’t the only books out there with those names, believe it or not).

But I don’t think’s that’s a bad thing. After all, it’d suck if a lot of negative reviews brought down your book’s average because of some silly confusion. And I’d prefer to get success through my own hard work, creativity, and the help of my good friends and/or readers rather than through some silly mix-up of random chance.  More satisfactory that way, anyway.

I just have to write something that will allow that sort of success. Well, hopefully that story will come soon, if it hasn’t already. We’ll just have to wait and see.

What do you think of the King/Schultz mix-up?

If this happened to you, how you would react?

Epic Rap Battles of History: Edgar Allen Poe vs. Stephen King

Posted: June 2, 2014 in Living and Life, Scary Stuff
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It seems that my prayers have been answered. Either that or I and the many people lobbying for this video to come have finally gotten what we desired.

Anyone who spends enough time on YouTube will probably come across the Epic Rap Battles of History videos. They are funny, have more history than the History Channel does these days, and are really well done. Several of them, such as the Adolf Hitler vs. Darth Vader series, the Doctor Who vs. Doc Brown battle, and the famous Donald Trump vs. Ebenezer Scrooge Christmas special, have become viral sensations. And in a stroke of creative genius, these guys have put out what has to be my favorite video yet: Edgar Allen Poe vs. Stephen King!

The video stars slam poet and rapper George Watsky as Mr. Poe, while Zach Sherwin (aka MC Mr. Napkins) plays his Royal Scariness King. It’s a delightful back-and-forth between the two horror greats, with Poe even rapping in trochee (the form of verse The Raven was written in) and King making references to both his and Poe’s work, as well as poking fun at a certain kid’s movie’s protagonist’s name. Plus the soundtrack is just perfect. But why just read me praise it? Check it out below:

Awesome, right? And it’s very hard to choose a winner, though I have to go with King (he’s got the best disses). Funnily enough, Mr. King himself had some different thoughts:

Mr. King, don’t put yourself down. Frankly, I thought you were sharper than Annie Wilkes’s axe. And I look forward to reading Doctor Sleep and Mr. Mercedes, once I can find the time to do it. In the meantime, can I interest you in one of my books?

Who do you think won? Why? And who would you like to see in another rap battle?

Personally I’m hoping for Walt Disney vs. Stan Lee or Freddy Kreuger vs. Jack the Ripper (yes, that is disturbing. But would you expect any less from me?).

Rape Is NOT Funny

Posted: May 3, 2014 in Living and Life, Politics and Leadership, Reflections, Social Activism
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I’m going to share something that happened to me this morning with you all. I woke up much later than I’d planned to, made myself breakfast, and turned on my laptop to see my messages. In my inbox, I found that someone had replied to a comment I’d made to a YouTube video. The video in question was a Tibetan bowl singing meditation video that I listened to yesterday in order to relax after a long day. When it was over, I had commented, “Whoa, what did that just do to me?” (I was really relaxed afterwards). Between commenting on that video and checking my messages, some merry prankster had replied to my comment with this: “it raped you…with Tibetan singing bowls :)”.

Of course, you can guess how I replied: “not funny”.

And it’s true, rape is not funny, especially when you look at the realities of the problem. It’s estimated that every two minutes, an American is sexually assaulted. One in five female college students will be sexually assaulted before they graduate, usually by someone they know. Often their rapists are not punished as thoroughly as they should be by the university, receiving academic probation or being banned from campus for a year. Imagine having to be on the same campus as your rapist every day until one or both of you have graduated. It’s enough to drive you insane. And rapists who are let off easy like this are likely to repeat and rape again, averaging six assaults before graduation. It’s even likelier for rapists who include violent acts like strangulation in their assaults. Because of these statistics and several colleges apparently mishandling sexual assaults, 55 universities, my own included, are being investigated for mishandling sexual assault cases by the federal government. For some victims, they wish this investigation would’ve come sooner.

And that’s not the worst part about it. In some countries women are jailed or killed if they are raped, sometimes with the permission of the governments that are supposed to protect them. These “honor killings” or jail sentences are supposed to punish the woman for making herself sexually desirable to her rapist and causing him to commit adultery. Sometimes they are even married off to their rapists in order to preserve family honor! For many women, anxiety, depression, PTSD, and other psychological disorders can arise from being sexually assaulted, so imagine having to be punished by law or married to your rapist in order to preserve some silly notion of honor.

Even in countries where women aren’t punished or married off on their rapists, sometimes things are little better. Assault victims are shamed or intimidated into keeping silent for a variety of reasons. They may believe that their assault was their fault, or that they’ll be humiliated or disbelieved if they come forward, or that coming forward will forever change how they’re viewed by people. In cases of pregnancy, some won’t be able to get abortions because laws make it difficult or impossible to do so.

Even in the United States, supposedly a progressive country where all are equal, most are seriously misinformed about sexual assault. They believe it only happens to others, that all rapists are strangers to the victim, that it’s a rare occurrence. In reality, rape is all too common, as well as pregnancies that result from rape, most rapists are someone the victims know, and it could happen to just about anyone. And when we do not blame the rapists but find ways to blame or hurt the victims or create reasons why we shouldn’t believe them, we only make things worse.

And so do the comedians who make fun of rape. Whether they make one single joke or an entire act out of rape and sexual assault, they are doing as much damage as some rapists. They tell people that rape isn’t a serious problem, that you can make fun of it and the victims who are assaulted every two minutes in America (there was a great Law & Order: SVU episode about this recently). And some people, like my commenter above, will take these comedians seriously. One or two may actually rape themselves, believing it’s no big deal.

I’m here saying that rape is a very big deal, and it is not something that should be made fun of or turned into comedy club stand-up. Rape is a serious problem people all over the world must face, and that unless we seriously try to change our culture, things will not improve. They’ll stay the same, or get worse.

So if you ever find yourself confronted with a rape joke or you think about making a rape joke, imagine that making such a joke makes someone as horrible as a rapist. And then ask yourself if you should really laugh at or make that joke, or if you should try and change things so that those jokes are never made again. You might get thanked down the road for that.

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